E - Everyone

pennyworth

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Far away in a time and place

lived a girl with blue eyes

“Look at me please, look at my cobalt eyes”

the girl would beg and scream

I’m doing so well haven’t you heard?

I’m such a good girl

lookin’ like a doll

sweet as ice cream without

any flaws

So good, this girl

Haven’t you seen?

I’m a girl far above the rest!

Everybody, everybody, look only at me!

Adore me, praise me, and love me!

Look at me I beg

Take what you want from me

Take all that I have

and all that I keep

I scream for more

Attention that I DESERVE

cobalt cataracts, luster burnt to a shade

Look at me till I’m completely insane

moreandmoreandmoreandmoreand more.

Comments & reviews · 4
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User avatar
lovelydove
Comment

I really felt this poem. I have to say this out of shame; I just love attention. I work my hardest in order to get it too. I never get it though. And even when I wait for attention to come to me, it never comes. I'll do the most drastic things just SO I CAN GET SOMEONE TO NOTICE ME!
the girl would beg and scream

I’m doing so well haven’t you heard?

I’m such a good girl

lookin’ like a doll

sweet as ice cream without

any flaws

So good, this girl

Haven’t you seen?

I’m a girl far above the rest!

Everybody, everybody, look only at me!

Adore me, praise me, and love me!

Look at me I beg

Take what you want from me

Take all that I have

and all that I keep

I scream for more

Attention that I DESERVE
This part I just enjoyed. I feel like that's how I act when I want someone to look, like, or even compliment me. I feel like with all human beings, we want to be seen, and to be noticed. And that is my biggest downfall. I try to focus on not wanting attention so much, but I just can't. I need that validation and approval for someone else that would boost my self confidence.
It’s like I’m constantly performing, hoping someone will finally say, “I see you.”
I need that approval from others to feel like I’m doing something right, like I’m enough.
This poem captured that desperation so well. It was raw, loud, and painfully honest. And in that honesty, I felt seen.That’s why this poem meant so much to me—it didn’t just speak to me, it spoke for me.

User avatar
lovelydove
Review

I really felt this poem. I have to say this out of shame; I just love attention. I work my hardest in order to get it too. I never get it though. And even when I wait for attention to come to me, it never comes. I'll do the most drastic things just SO I CAN GET SOMEONE TO NOTICE ME!
the girl would beg and scream

I’m doing so well haven’t you heard?

I’m such a good girl

lookin’ like a doll

sweet as ice cream without

any flaws

So good, this girl

Haven’t you seen?

I’m a girl far above the rest!

Everybody, everybody, look only at me!

Adore me, praise me, and love me!

Look at me I beg

Take what you want from me

Take all that I have

and all that I keep

I scream for more

Attention that I DESERVE
This part I just enjoyed. I feel like that's how I act when I want someone to look, like, or even compliment me. I feel like with all human beings, we want to be seen, and to be noticed. And that is my biggest downfall. I try to focus on not wanting attention so much, but I just can't. I need that validation and approval for someone else that would boost my self confidence.
It’s like I’m constantly performing, hoping someone will finally say, “I see you.”
I need that approval from others to feel like I’m doing something right, like I’m enough.
This poem captured that desperation so well. It was raw, loud, and painfully honest. And in that honesty, I felt seen.That’s why this poem meant so much to me—it didn’t just speak to me, it spoke for me.

User avatar
AlexWrites
Review

Hey IanPark! This is Alex, here with a review in honor of August's Review Day Today. Without any delay, let's get analysing.

The title didn't give me much to work with until I finished reading the poetry but the description was pretty well summarising. I think pennyworth goes on to taunt the real value of the attention the girl is so mad behind- mere dimes. Certainly an interesting original concept, I've never read anything like it.

The tone is enthralling like a siren's song with the girl demanding attention from the common folk, as if she's really desperate for it. She's depicted a beautiful young girl who's got a sweet personality and blue eyes. She's undeniably pretty and she knows it but still seeks to hear it from others to quieten her inner insecurities. It goes on to state how hungry she is for human validation and lacks self assurance and security that one must possess.

the girl would beg and scream
I’m doing so well haven’t you heard?
I’m such a good girl
lookin’ like a doll
any flaws
So good, this girl
Haven’t you seen?
I’m a girl far above the rest!


She even sounds psychotic here, seeking the attention of the masses. The reader is also told that she doesn't just rely on her good looks, but does the work to be a good girl to ensure praise. While it is a positive quality in person, I wonder if it's her just going overboard for seeking attention.

Take what you want from me
Take all that I have
and all that I keep
I scream for more
Attention that I DESERVE
Look at me till I’m completely insane
moreandmoreandmoreandmoreand more.


Things take a deeper dive in these closing lines. The girl is willing to exchange anything for validation and attention, all that she holds dear. She gets them every once in a while but she's nowhere near satisfied. She feels she's somehow entitled to it all, very peculiar.

Overall, this poem is an amusing cry for attention. The girl depicted is walking perfection but she needs other's validation to feel it. This piece reminded me of the popular girls in highschool movies and a popular song lyric- 'begging on your knees to be popular'. The girl lacks self esteem and it's clearly reflecting in her actions, she needs to be more secure in her worth as a person independent of other's opinion. It my absolute pleasure reviewing this, I had a great time. Fabulous unique poem, hope to read more from you soon.

Regards
Alex

Hey, I really like this, especially how the emotions in the poem shift and the perspective just gets more and more insane. At first it reads like a story, then a description, then a cry for attention, until it comes to just a scream. I was a little confused with the perspective, because of the shifts from third person the first person (and the other way around), but besides that I really enjoyed this poem. Great job!



The simple truth is that authors like making people squirm. If this weren't the case, all novels would be filled completely with cute bunnies having birthday parties.
— Brandon Sanderson, Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians