Colors brighten earths surface,
Cascades of green cover hillsides.
Who are we to take away from
life's simple pleasures?
The pure, innocent laughter,
of small children.
Life's beauty is the sole reason,
we exist on earth.
Life's beauty is so simple.
Yet so exquisite,
like Alaska's Natural Lights.
Life's Beauty is pure love.
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Canary word: Present
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I thought this poem was simple and beautiful. You didn't use too many metaphors to jumble it up and I appreciate that. I agree, child's laughter can be one of life's greatest pleasures. A few of your statements, however, didn't jive too well with me. You said:
I think I understand what you are implying, that we often take the simple thing's in life for granted, but I wish you had expanded on this a bit. You don't have to overwhelm us, just a line or two.
I personally don't agree with you on this point, as it seems pretty meaningless to live a life soley for the purpose of enjoying pretty things. I think life is more about learning to love our fellow man, than stopping to enjoy the scenery.
This line boggled my mind a bit, since up until this point, your poetry had been mostly about nature and natural wonders. I just thought that it didn't fit in with your theme.
Other than that, I really did enjoy your work. I do hope you end up posting more of your poetry.
Hi! I'll be your reviewer today!
I like this, it really makes my mind jog. But I think it would flow better if it was:Who are we,
to take away from life's simple pleasures?
This was amazing. It made me look outside at the view of the mountains and I was like, "Wow...its true." It really made me feel different. Great work, I loved it.
Aside from that one correction, it was amazing. Great job.
~Forest