Removed.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
That was the best thing I've read all day!
Wow... just wow. I actually found this humorous.
And of course just the mere name brings in tons of people. I thought the whole thing was brilliant. The whole thing about Rudolph's nose I thought was quite clever. Come to think of it, it was all clever! I can't think of anyone who wouldn't find this amusing.
The title is very attracting and I'm glad it is because this is a good story, unless it's true?
It's all planned very well and I enjoyed the ending excpet now people will probably think the man is crazy.
I did see a spelling mistake, you wrote thru instead of through, just so you know.
The layout is also very attracting, I couldn't stop reading, you should write more santa encounter short stories.
Very good, well done.
That was great.i was attracted by just its tittle.u're such a great comedian.great work,buddy
LOVE THIS OMG. I was dying laughing. You have a talent for comedy my friend. Please write more like this. I love the way it is written. I agree with other commenters, I like how blanks were cleared up in the end. Keep up the good work. I want to see more! Lol.
I'm new to YWS and am so happy to see so much talent on here.
LOVE THIS OMG. I was dying laughing. You have a talent for comedy my friend. Please write more like this. I love the way it is written. I agree with other commenters, I like how blanks were cleared up in the end. Keep up the good work. I want to see more! Lol.
I'm new to YWS and am so happy to see so much talent on here.
Hey there! Man... what a story you wrote! The minute I started reading this, I was smiling and this close to laughing my butt off, but I couldn't because I was supposed to be doing homework while I was reading this! *laughs* This was so flipping hilarious! Marvelous job! I loved every part from start to finish, and loved how the blanks became filled... sorta. The main character has to be one of the most incredulous people ever written! I also loved Callahan and everyone else, even Amish Santa! *cracks up even more* There weren't that many mistakes I saw, just that at one point you put two spaces from the quotation marks, and now I can't find where it was... Grr... Well, just do a quick overlook, okay? Thank you. Well... overall, great piece of work! Thanks so much writing this which gave me a great laugh, and have a nice day!
Love,
Perks
That was REAAAAALLY weird. I loved it, though!!!!!! Grrrreat job!!!! (DOn't know why I did the Grrrrr thing.)
IT WAS RUDOLPH AND AMISH SANTA! Knew it! Amazing job it was so fun to read! * applauds rapidly* Whoooooooo!
*claps ecstatically*
I am IN LOVE with this! I am actually sitting here with like the biggest smile on my face - this is awesome. I've never read a story like this - I applaud you for using all dialogue. A few things though. I think you're pushing it a little bit with the Mr. Potato Head thing. I understand that it's all a joke that he left a toy behind, but I feel like it would be more believable if it was something else. Like you said the boy he was delivering to was amish, so think about what santa might be giving to a boy or girl that is Amish. At least, don't start with that line, because I was a little turned away when I read the first line. I mean, your title being "I shot santa in self defense" is a hook in its own, but the first couple sentences needs a better hook. All in all, really great piece, and you have plenty of revision time before the holidays