Black Roses

Sueprin- thanks so much for the help. I really always wished for people to read my work and help me improve, because i know its not perfect.
When I get a chance i will fix it and hope you reread it. Im really busy now a days, end of the year exams.

And Vampireacademyfreak3 Im glad you liked it =) I'll fix it up and I hope you like it even more.

Hi. I love your poem, but every work needs more improvement. So here's few little nitpicks

HalahAli wrote:when I die, promise to bring roses, not just any roses dark red roses almost black roses .

Forgot the caps in "when." And it'sjust an opinion, but it might do better with out that last "roses" when you say "almost black roses."

And before you lay them on my grave, cut off the thorns because they were the reason I had passed away.

I personally love the line when you say "they were reason I had passed away."

My life is a rose with so many thorns. I started off bright red and as time passed, and I got the worst of life, the bright

I think you should say "...and as time passed, I got the worst... " instead of the extra "and".

Lay them down on my grave, and for every dark rose you see, remember me, that rose has my spirit, that rose was once me.
Personally, I think "every black rose" is better then "every dark roses"

So first I want to say welcome to yws and its a pleasure! Now down to the nitty gritty I read your other piece wishes and although it wasnt the best i've seen I really liked this alot better. The topic you choose to talk about was great. I liked the fact that you compared the character's life to a black rose. overall good job.
p.s my last names ali too