speechless

Yay for romance poems! I applaud you for pulling a Taylor Swift my friend, they're always fun to read. Anyway, I quite like this, you describe this love very well.

If anything, I think some of your rhymes could use some work. Be sure to read through the poem out loud a couple times, to ensure that each line flows well. The strongest verse was probably:
"Your words, they still hang on my mind,
Now I realize their intention.
You shook me up and hung me out to dry,
Overflowing misguided love, and displaced affection."

And the weakest one is probably:
"I'm not sure what to say here,
I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
But it still runs deep, like a knife in the back.
No wonder you can't look me in the eye."
I think that if you made the phrases less full sentences and more snippets, the whole poem might flow better. For example, if in the third line of the first verse, you put, "It still runs deep, a knife in the back." the whole verse will be easier to read.

Either way, I still really love this poem! Thank you so much for writing, keep up the good work!

A short piece! I thank the heavens for this beautiful work of art! No, seriously, this is one good poem!

Gummy's the name, reviewing's my game, and today I'm going to review "speechless" by Granger2291.

Even though it's a little short, I want to note the many positive aspects of this piece. For starters, the grammar is pristine, and I wouldn't expect any less from you. The theme not only fits Ms. Swift to the T of her first name, it also stays nice and uniform throughout the course of the poem. I was interested from start to finish, though it left me wanting for more at the end... but that's just me!

I wouldn't mind this being a lyrical poem, set to the light tune of a strumming guitar. It has the potential to be one, after all! Well, I guess that's it for now! Take care, and keep writing! Remember that practice is key!

well I don't know about the other people in the universal universitile universe- but I do rather like Taylor Swift ^ ^ (Guilty confession, love >:D Do with it what you will, mock me if thou must and leave me out to die!-she said in as Shakespearean a tone as she could- ) I can in fact relate to this feeling....of being betrayed and hurt like that. But....I won't go into details like that because nobody wants to hear happy newbie Red get all mopey and sad and angry all over again, now do they? No, I would think not. But I can tell you that it strikes a chord with me. I don't know what it is about lyrics compared to poetry, but somehow I just seem to understand them better. I'm starting to take up songwriting myself, and I could actually take a hint or two from you ^ ^ Sure, maybe I shouldn't go all Taylor-Swifty like and write about love and heartbreak ALL THE TIME (especially since I've been single for a while now......)But a love song or two couldn't hurt, right? Maybe one day I'll be able to write lyrics as well as you do- but that day is very far away!

Love Love Lovity Love,
Red <3

its very nice piece i love it ....keep writing

Hi.
i liked the piece quite a lot actually. It had a strange sense of innocence, entangled with hurt in it.
Though it does not give us any details of what went wrong, and why are the two not together anymore, or why the heart got broken, it still conveys the pain to us.
for me, it feels more like a personal message that can only be decoded by the other person of the two here. So, with that in mind, it reads fine.
though i would have loved for it to be more detailed.

keep writing.
-Erin