Young Writers Society

This was a heart-wrenching poem from the perspective of the abused, and while one might understandably interpret that abuse as violent sexual murder in nature, it actually works well as a metaphor for other kinds of mistreatment as well-what is abuse but a violent assault on the integrity of the abused? It captures the angry, righteous indignation; the pity; the sadness; the fear; the feeling of "damaged goods"-but perfect angels loose none of their value for being defiled, rather they are elevated in esteem and value for the soul-crushing horror they endure. Those you abuse are indeed to be pitied, for purity DOES flee from them, and their soul shall know no rest, and they shall be a pariah in a living hell. I wish this poem had driven home this message, to provide answers and comfort to those beset by demons who deserve absolutely NONE of them. Nevertheless, this was a worthy read-would recommend.

Hey there!

So, I don't really know what the topic of this is. Second stanza makes it seem like something surrounding assault, but then it moves onto how she is dead? Of course, that does happen to some and it's terrible, but at first it doesn't feel like it'd lead up to something like that. Maybe try adding in a line or two about more of what happened between the attack and finding her body at the crime scene if that makes sense.

Purity was running away from you because it could not stand the view

She was a cover girl on a magazine, now her body is left at the scene. She now appears on every screen sad part is she was only Eighteen.

This poem is the true definition of beauty!! Wow, grace! Wonderful job done! Every word produces so great an imagery, each word leaving a sigh in your mind and when you think of the girl, darkness is all you can see with the inner promise to light up the candle when you grow up. Not only to chase the darkness but also to scare away the rapists from the large mass of innocent girls whose innocence they feed on.

You had no right! To destroy such beauty. A girl who was so bright now heads to the light.

You had no right! To rip her clothes off, attack her at night then call yourself tough.

Pity was filled in her eyes, while you laugh, she cries. Purity was running away from you because it could not stand the view

She was a cover girl on a magazine, now her body is left at the scene. She now appears on every screen sad part is she was only Eighteen.

She was the definition of perfection but you destroyed her reflection.

You have no right! to even see the daylight while she is six feet underground and you walk on the same ground.

Hi! Because of the topic, you should tag this as at least 12+.