I apologize for this. I really do. But I was bored, and at least you can say I don't take myself to seriously. 
OPEN CURTAIN. TABLE AT CENTRE, WITH NEAT TABLECLOTH AND WHAT WE CAN ASSUME IS THE FINE CHINA. GATHERED AROUND THIS TABLE ARE THE ELDERBERRY’S. THE PATRIACH, DONALD IS IN THE MIDDLE. AN OVERFED CAPITALIST, SCOFFING HIS PLATE. THE LONG SUFFERING WIFE DOROTHY SITS BESIDE HIM. THE TWO TEENAGE CHILDREN SIT AT EITHER END. CATELIN, WHO SO DESPERATELY WANTS TO BE DESPRESSED AND ANGST RIDDEN, AND TINA, WHO IS DESPRESSED AND ANGST RIDDEN.
DOROTHY (to catelin)
You’re not eating much of your food, dear. Are you feeling alright?
CATELIN
I refuse to eat your empty meals. You’re just trying to make me like everyone else. I am unique!
DONALD AND TINA CHUCKLE. CATELIN GLARES AT THEM. BABARA LOOKS AT HER FORK THOUGHTFULLY, AS IF SHE COULD STICK A FORK IN OF THEM. SHE THEN JABS IT IN HER FOOD.
TINA
I got an A in English today.
THE FAMILY MURMURS IN ACKNOWLEDGEMENT.
BABARA (TRYING TO SOUND INTERSTED)
That’s good.
TINA (THROUGH GRITTED TEETH)
Yes. It is.
CATELIN
My life is an eternal black hole.
TINA LOOKS DISGUSTED.
TINA
No it isn’t!
CATELIN
Oh my god, it so is!
TINA
Get over yourself, Catelin! You are not a goth.
CATELIN
I am so. I write poetry!
THE GIRLS DECSEND INTO POINTLESS SHOUTING. DONALD LOOKS FEDUP AND DECIDES THAT WHATEVER IS UP HIS NOSE IS MORE INTERESTING. BABARA, LOOKING ON THE VERGE OF BUTCHERING EVERYONE, STANDS UP AND STRETCHES HER HAND, AS IF TO PUT AN INVISBLE BARRIER BETWEEN THE FEUDING SISTERS.
BABARA (RAISNG HER VOICE)
Please, just everybody, shut up
THE WHOLE FAMILY STARES AT HER, DUMBFOUNDED.
BABARA CALMS DOWN SLIGHTLY. SHE TAKES A DEEP BREATH.
BABARA (SLOWLY)
Why don’t we just all agree that Catelin’s life is an everlasting black hole.
CATELIN
Eternal.
BABARA
Eternal Black hole. Okay?
THE TWO GIRLS LOOK AT EACH OTHER. A MUTUAL FEELING OF PITY FOR THEIR MOTHER CAUSES THEM TO BE QUIET. BABARA SITS DOWN. SHE SMILES, BUT A PLASTIC SMILE.
DOORBELL RINGS.
BABS
I’ll get it!
SHE DARTS FROM THE TABLE AND OFFSTAGE.
BABARA
It bet it’s that awful boyfriend of hers. He strikes me as-
A SCREAM, OFFSTAGE. THE WHOLE DINNERTABLE PAUSE, APART FROM DONALD WHO CONTINUES TO EAT.
ENTER DEATH. A HOODED FIGURE WITH A STICK.
DEATH
Hey!
DONALD COLLAPSES SUDDENLY. HIS HANDS CLUTCHING HIS CHEST.
DEATH
Oh god. I’m early.
BABARA
Death?
DEATH
No, it’s Joan Rivers.
HE CHUCKLES AND HIS HANDS CLUTCH HIS SIDES.
I’m sorry. Old Grim Reaper joke. Anyhoos, your daughter collapsed when she saw me. She should come around soon.
BABARA
Should?
DEATH (HASTILY CHANGING THE SUBJECT)
Aren’t you upset? Your husbands dead?
And you-
HE POINTS TO CATELIN.
Not even a tear?
CATELIN
I’m a goth- I welcome death.
DEATH SHRUGS
Unlucky, you’re not on the list. And with a face like that, you wont be on for a long time.
CATELIN DOES A GIRLY, COY LAUGH.
CATELIN
Not so bad yourself.
BABARA
Catelin! Stop flirting with death.
TINA STRUGGLES IN.
Part 2 soon, if you can bare it!
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
Hehehee, that was amazing! very funny, and I love the whole firting with death thing. And the fac that Catelin wants to be depressd! It'd be great to see it acted out
LMFAO.
Funnyyy.
Few mistakes though with the spacing of things. But not much.
Yooo.
:]
hehe, I'm amused. flirting with death, cute. and the whole "i'm an eternal black hole" thing is great. The sisters are like Goth and Emo and it makes me smile.