Things to be happy about
Gravel roads in upstate New York,
The scent of Gasoline coming from the exhaust of a station wagon,
A new pair of shoes,
Warm cookies,
Fresh linens,
New guitar strings,
Degraw Street at eleven A.M,
Wooden decks on mount Desert Island,
Northern Lights (the movie),
Polar bears,
Warm pants on a cold morning,
Wearing real rabbit fur gloves,
Ignoring guilt,
Olive pits,
Head massages,
Warm slippers,
Crackers and cheese,
Intellectual rigor,
Over night trains, the kind with sleeper cars,
Scarves.
Prospect park dirt on a warm day,
Knowing its Lasagna before dinner is served,
Neurotic Jewish men,
Not doing drugs,
Sweaters,
Listening to languages you can’t understand,
Quiet breaks,
Appreciating art,
Solving puzzles,
Modern furniture,
Old buildings in a modern world,
Laptops,
Dumplings,
Careless days,
Cobblestone streets,
Theatrical performances,
Winter days,
Summer nights,
Snooze buttons,
Cleaning your ears,
Baked beans (from England),
Dry humor,
Textured ceilings,
Auction houses,
Duck ponds,
Baseball cards,
Gravel roads in upstate New York.
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
I want to hug you, this made me so happy.
I like that this is very sensory. It involves tastes and smells and sounds and temperatures and I can feel myself in warm pants and warm slippers and a sweater eating a warm cookie on a winter morning, lounging carelessly around my house looking at the textured ceiling & ignoring my guilt. (I actually have a textured ceiling!)
I also like that it ends the same way it begins, like this list of happy things will play endlessly on repeat & we'll all be warm and happy forever.
But besides how lovely it is, it's not much like a poem. It's like a list with commas. I wouldn't really have you change anything about it, but it's also not really a poem... (sorry to be so wishy-washy).
Lovely, just lovely,
Rachel
This was good and made me feel, well, happy. Sometimes you just need to remind yourself that even though things are tough at the moment, life isn't all that bad. I've been feeling kind of down lately, so thanks for reminding me of that.
So far as the technical stuff goes, you did a pretty good job. My only two suggestions would be a) don't include parentheses and b) post this as other. It's not that there's anything wrong with it, just it doesn't really have any poetic devices or anything, and I think it would just have a better home there. So far as the parentheses go:
Change to "The movie "Northern Lights".
Change to "English baked beans", or just get rid of the parentheses.
Other than that, I liked it.