When I say I love you
It doesn’t mean,
You’re mine and that’s it
It means:
I'm there for you,
When you’re down I'll pick you up,
When your sad I'll cheer you up,
When you need someone ill be standing there.
If you could only know:
How much I care,
How much I need you,
There are no words that compare.
When I kiss you,
It doesn’t mean,
I love you,
It means:
Never let me go,
I care so much for you,
I just need you to know,
How much you mean to me,
I only wish
You could see
The reason I'm there for you,
It’s because you’re the only person:
I can talk to when I'm bothered,
I can love when I need loving most,
Hold when I’ve missed you,
And kiss, when I need you to know…
I love you forever x
Points:
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Canary word: Present
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Hey!
Darko basically said everything for me.
Isn't that just saying that you love her forever? Yet you said it doesn't mean you love her. I'm confused.
Okay, definitely cut this out or add to it. It just sounds.... kind-of strange sitting there alone.
Other than that, I liked this poem! Keep up the good work!
zOe
This is like an introduction or what? It's kind of cute, but it's too ordinary, you almost just narrating this stanza and because of that-it doesn't fit into the concept of the poem.
1 - You're or you are!
When, when, when... Why do everyone try to repeat some stupid word in this love poems?
Why the colon in the first verse
The last verse is culmination of this bulls... That verse doesn't makes any sense. And it's cliché, and it's all that should not be in some serious love poems.
You said that kiss doesn't mean that you love someone.
Now see the last and pre-last stanza: you said that he/she is the only person you can kiss when you need to know that you love him/her forever. Does that means you do not love him/her forever? I'm confused. If you gave him/her the poem, and if she/he is smart-you're screwed. By all this, I can only conclude that your feelings aren't real. -.-
And then: "never let me go" blah-blah-blah..."I need you to know how much you mean to me"...boring and hypocritical! By the end of the poem, the reader will die.
...
...
Why is this verse alone? You need it to be in some stanza here.
How ironically...your nick is freedom of writing, but you write about something really lame, that has no relations with freedom or any restriction in disputing about.
Sorry about the review, but I'm always harsh.