I envy those who’ve just stopped feeling. The damaged flesh of their hearts has healed over thick and impenetrable, while mine is covered in wounds that won’t close.
How easy it is for someone to slip into my gaping, bloody lacerations and cause further damage. I thought what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, not more vulnerable!
I have no defenses, no means of preventing a cut right to my core. I have nothing and nobody to depend upon.
Please help me!
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Hey! This is just going to be a short review, but here it is.
I really enjoyed this, even if it is so raw and vulnerable. I related to a lot of the lines and some I read and went "Wow, that is so true..."
The gory-ness of this is vivid, but I think that definitely works with the poem to create a strong emotion in the reader.
This is short and sweet; it gets to the point and tells the reader what is going on. The first line gets right to it, and I appreciate that.
I'm not sure if you wrote this about yourself or from the point of view of a character, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm always here if you ever want to talk about anything (even though we don't know each other)!
Anyway, that's it! I really enjoyed this and found it disturbingly relatable.
Thanks for sharing!
I'll start by saying that I find the structure of this poem very interesting, but that's what makes freewriting beautiful. I like how it starts by mentioning "emotionless" people, I especially appreciate it because I have experience in being both "emotionless" and extremely vulnerable, so it's a really nice touch. I also find it interesting how you use graphic language to explain yourself and describe your feeling, I think you did a pretty decent job of it. And to wrap it all up, I really like how you end it. It's always cool when writers use the title in the last line, or at least I personally get quite the kick out of it.
Great job, neat poem.