To those who don't understand,
No one quite understands my reasons, though they are there, just hiding from everyone but me. No one understands that I sit in class hating the minutes that pass by. And no one understands why once my time is up, I run to the bus.
My reason is this; I'm not fit for this world. My world is elsewhere, anywhere but there. I hate the moments that are spent in a room, feeling more like a jail, because they could be better spent and I'll never get them back. I run to the bus because once I am there, I am closer to where I belong and deserve to be.
No one understands why I sit alone in my spare time. No one quite understands why I grow silent and angry when forced to be somewhere else. No one understands that I'm happier here, secluded, just my thoughts to speak to me.
Why do I sit alone? Because alone is special, it's my time, and it brings me the peace I need. I hate leaving my world and being forced into another. I feel excluded and unwanted, like I'm wearing a muzzle. That is why I grow silent, unable to speak, restricted, and why I grow angry. No one likes being controlled. I'm happier because alone, I can focus on what I love, on my passions and dreams.
No one understands why I cried when threatened to remove my world. No one understands where my world is. No one understands how I got there, and though I did not start there, I have grown to love, to crave it.
I cried because it was all that I had, the only thing that brings me joy. Sure, I can be happy elsewhere, but happiness is fleeting, and in my world, I know there will be joy. I depend on it. My world is unseen, untouched, and filled with people who care more than I thought possible. It is not physical, it is more emotional, spiritual, mental. For my world is stuck inside a machine. My world comes from the Internet. It sounds ridiculous, to feel so strongly about something that is meant to be unimportant. But once I started to feel cut off, once people first started inching away, I withdrew into my shell, looking inside for companionship and loyalty. I found it here, in a place where my best friend can be from England, yet he talks to me every day. Where the nicest person I talk to is across the globe, years separating us, and yet she is kind and understanding, more so than any people I physically know.
Do you understand now? I just don't fit in the real world. But I came to the internet as a misfit, and I found people just misplaced as I am. In a world full of misfits, we all belong. I didn't know if I would be accepted, praised as most people are here. But I leapt in and found that I was, and that everyone is. And that a total stranger with a made up name could suddenly lift my spirits from a long week of real people with real names tormented me. I found home.
My entire world exists here. Writing, Entertainment, Fandoms, Learning, Friendship, everything that I love exists in this place. Do my reasons make sense now? Do you know why I cried when it was threatened to be removed? Do you know why I await for this place every time I leave? Do you understand?
EverWinter
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
Hey, Eevee! Cassy here for another review!
Well, I think this could've been a long prose poem, but that's just my opinion. Oh, and another thing? Don't you dare delete this. It isn't bad whether you like it or not, and I think this will be my shortest review out of all your works. Anyway, I guess we should get to the review?
Alright, here's the first thing I noticed(Since I don't know what,"Other,"is)- you use,"understands," a lot. and I get that. The title says it, I know it's going to be used a lot. But, there are other words you could use to describe it. Like, no one comprehends, no one gets, no one will ever know. Things like that. It also helps in making it more dramatic, I guess you would say. Anyway, I guess overall my only beef with this entire work is the repetition. You can find different ways to describe or say something without using the same thing over and over and over. And, if I understand correctly, this was because of venting? Here's what I do whilst venting- write. Here's what you do whilst venting- write. So it's UNDERSTANDABLE(see what I did there) that you'd get caught up in your emotions. And since you're stuck in that one emotion, I guess you'd repeat it. But try to make it more diverse when you're writing something. So you can look at it and see the differences.
Overall, though, I really did like this. Props for that, Eevee. I'll be moving onto your other stuff now.
Keep doing what you're doing and keep on keeping on.
Your friend, Cassy.
I connect to this as well. I would have connected a lot better a couple years ago, but recently my social status has escalated and I've become a lot more social with people I never thought I would care about. The work is fantastic, and you could probably write a very long short story or perhaps a miniature biography describing why or what you love about the internet and how exactly it calms your mind. I can also tell you that things work themselves out, and eventually you will find where you belong. Whether it be going to college, obtaining a career, meeting the love of your life. Things will work out and you will no longer feel like a misfit. It's just a lot about your attitude and outlook on things. Keep up the great work! I loved the piece and it gave great insight into your mind and how exactly you see things.
Honestly, I really connect to this since this is my school life as well. My writing often tends to follow around my school life too. Your piece really brought out your emotions well. However, I think that you could be a bit more creative with your sentence structure. When I skim over this, I feel myself losing interest, even though it's a topic I relate to very personally. I think it's because your sentence structure is rather placid, and could use some more creativity to spice it up. It's neat, it's pristine, but it's lacking that little push to it that really gets your words across. Compared to a fair bit of writing I see here, the structure is controlled and that's definitely a good thing. To be honest, I'm sick of reading a piece and then cringing because the author didn't have any structure to it and it went all over the place. Maybe I'm being a hypocrite, since I have an extremely bad habit of letting my writing wander as well. But I think you should think about letting your writing stray more, while I should probably focus on it less.
Another thing that could help you is maybe adding some more metaphors and similes. Everything is very straightforward. I agree with your writing and I relate to it, but without the creativity, it kind of reminds me of tumblr. Talking about how much you dislike everything around you and how different you are. A agree with that mindset, since inside, we're all a little bit tumblrina. But if you add some more creative language and think about it in a slightly different light, I could see this piece going much farther. It's good as it is now, but it has so much potential. I want to see more added to this piece and maybe flesh out a new perspective on it. And I hope to see more of this on the site.
This is so relatable!
Not to me :/ but it's neatly written.