Published August 29, 2011
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138,281 Literary Works • 672,096 Reviews
No.'49'
I indeed am glad at your perception about my poem
Sometimes many of us live in that ward No. 49...
Thank you again and I will be looking forward reading you too =)
A lot of shuffling later and something I like!
I agree on the haunting tone, it's dark but in the oh so right way. The way you've written it as well gives me the impression of a very dry, sober voice telling the story yet there's also the stark raving mad screaming crazy person, it has so much character.
The title was what captured me first and I love the way you end explaining that it's ward no. 47. Throughout the poem you string the reader along and I know that I for one was very interested in who the poems protagonist was and you've captured the patient. I can see them in my head, it's great ^^
It also captures the way people dismiss something they either don't understand or are just not used to, like how you say
'People ‘know’ it, ah, so they say
I’m deaf, dumb and blind..
Or (you ‘know’) Just a patient
of Special Ward No. 49….'
You really feel the hopelessness and frustration of the patient as just because they are mentally unstable they become almost an animal, they get stripped of their humanity. I love it.
Overall I'm very impressed. I wouldn't have thought I'd ever say this but stay dark! You can really work it :] It'd be epic if you could cover other subjects with this same view, I think if you did a romantic poem like this it would be b-e-a-utifull! And if you do, let me know! I think you're a darn good poet, and I will be checking out your prose :]
I am not a great poet. Prose is my speciality.
But indeed, I thoroughly appreciate you stopping by and reading it =)
this poem is powerful and shows a large amount of determination. this also show how welll you give you character a voice, which makes you a great poet.
This is a good piece. It has that haunting tone, the sort that raises goosebumps. The workings of the "insane mind" as we call it is always amazing. I liked the tone and the flow was good. You have good imagery, and it produced that chilling effect.
a good read. Keep writing and best wishes.