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Young Writers Society


16+ Language

A Twins Hunt - Realisations (Chapter Two)

by EscapeToNeverland


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.

Brooks –

I walked into the cafeteria crawling with students and looked for the others. As I searched people knocked into me from all sides, jostling me on the spot, it took all my resolve not to snap and hit one of them – or all of them. I decided to give up my search for a moment and get some food; I jumped into the cafeteria line and laughed as girls kept looking at me. They all giggled, twirling their hair before turning back around to talk to their friends – no doubt about me. A girl ahead in the line was particularly brave and looked at me openly. I grinned widely and sauntered over to her place in line.

“Hey, I’m Brooks Richmond, I’m just starting today. I thought you looked kind, so I was wondering if I could eat lunch with you maybe.” I gave her a wink and a bright smile that I didn’t really feel. Damn it Fawn, why are you making me do this again? I knew she wouldn’t answer me, everything her and Claudia did was against their nature.

“Sure thing, I’m Hailey Brayan and this is Renee York. So where did you come from? Why come to a place like Daxton? ” Hailey battered her long eyelashes at me and smiled brightly, as I’d walked around the halls this morning I’d already heard a bit about Hailey and Renee.

Hailey, the head cheerleader of the school, was pretty enough, very typical. Her long, platinum blond hair falling just short of her waist, she had brilliant, almost sapphire, blue eyes that sparkled in the light. She had so much makeup on I could only just tell that her skin was normally a pale tone and a thousand watt smile that was too bright to be real. From what I’d heard in the halls this morning I knew that she was in the same grade as me, that she’d probably slept with half the male cohort – if not then the whole football team – and that she had the IQ of a brain-dead goldfish.

Renee was almost the complete opposite from what I could gather. Yes she was on the cheerleading squad, but she wasn’t like Hailey. She hadn’t slept with half the school, she actually had half a brain and unlike Hailey she did things in class – I’d seen her working in trig. But not only that but she looked entirely different, her hair had a slight, natural wave, the colour of chestnut shot through with natural steaks of caramel and hung past her waist – almost to her. Her eyes were a kind brown framed with naturally long, thick lashes. Her skin was lightly sun-kissed and she didn’t wear much makeup at all, she didn’t need it. Her smile came and looked natural unlike Hailey’s, and just looking at her made my own fake smile feel more realistic.

But as I looked at her something about her seemed familiar, like I’d meet her before. But when you live most of your life hunting, training or talking to those who too hunt and train you don’t meet too many people like her. Normal people.

My gaze drifted to hers and she gave me a look that seemed so filled with meaning, with knowing, admiration, a dash of annoyance and a sprinkle of skill – she apparently knew exactly what I was thinking and knew the answer. Her look also seemed to say, ‘just wait, it’ll make sense soon.’

“Come on we sit over here.” Hailey’s voice sounded chipper, if not a little false, as she guided me towards a table full of other giggling girls and a whole lot of athletes. I felt the warmth coming off Renee, alerting me of her presence before she even spoke.

“Brace yourself, they aren’t like others. Very chatty, bitchy and quite annoying, you’re going to leave here shaking your head at humanity and probably a little pissed off.” I looked over at her in confusion, she gave me a conspirator’s wink and sat down next to an empty with a grace that surprised me, she patted the spot next to her. I was seriously starting to question the look in her eyes, she knew something I didn’t and she was right, it was annoying me already.

“Hey guys, this is Brooks, he’s new today, same with his brother – but he ain’t here as you can clearly see.” She paused a little as the others all said ‘hi’ and tried greeting themselves, before continuing. “And drum-roll please!” She paused again as the others stamped their feet and slapped a beat on the table before continuing. “My parents finally gave it the okay. My party is this weekend, my house; everyone can come, all night!” Renee finished her charade with a flourish of her hand, some people gave a little cheer and others gave her sympathetic smiles.

“This is your first party without Cyril isn’t it?” A guy named Ayden asked, comfort and understanding evident in his gentle voice.

“Ah, yeah it is, it won’t be the same without him that’s for sure. He was the partier out of us two!” She gave a short, soft laugh before turning to me with that knowing smile again. “Sorry you probably have no idea what we’re talking about. I’m having a massive party at my house this weekend – you can come if you want, I’ll give you the details later – and Cyril is – was – my twin brother. He died last year in an accident.”

Her last few words blew through me like a harsh wind, I looked at her with wide eyes, and everything clicked into place. Every look she gave me earlier, her flawless appearance, her melodic voice, her lethal grace, her silent feet – everything. Why are there so many fucking Hunters in one place?!

Walker –

I let out a sigh of relief as we walked out the doors and made our way over to a picnic table that Eva already occupied. I was so glad we were outside, we had walked past the crowded cafeteria, students had been everywhere, a pecking order had obviously been set out. But no matter what the whole bloody family is here, stayed at the fringes of my mind.

The fractured light that filtered through the large oak branches was bright against the cold, frosted grass. A slight breeze picked up Natalie’s hair, causing it to fan out around her beautifully. Before I realised I was staring she turned, catching my intense gaze. Her freckle dusted cheeks became rosy quickly, a shy smile playing around on her face, and as if it were an undeniable drug I began to smile along with her.

“Ah, guys? Did you just hear anything I just said?” Eva’s voice broke through my reprieve and it didn’t escape my notice that Natalie’s cheeks deepened. I look up and gave Eva a sheepish smile.

“Ah, no, not really. Could you repeat that?” she gave me a look that said ‘she wanted to be anywhere but there.’ She motioned for us to join her at the wooden table, when we were seated Eva began talking;

“So, Walker, by the way you reacted to your brother earlier you didn’t know he was here as well, correct?”

“Yeah… My older sisters are here too.”

“So your parents are here as well?” Natalie’s quite, soft as velvet voice cut in.

“No. You see we have a … dysfunctional family. None of us see or hear from our parents except for when they’re putting money in our accounts and even then we normally don’t. Other than that we don’t have any contact with them. I moved away and told my siblings never to come after me, unless they needed me, sooo…” My voice trailed off slowly and I looked around at the two sisters in front of me.

“The question is what do they need you for.” Our voices sounded suddenly loud with our realisation in the now still air.

“Wait,” Eva and I turned to look at Natalie, waiting for what she would say next. “Why did you come here Walker, Why this town?” Her eyes were wide as she talked, as if she had made her own discovery. I took a moment, my thoughts swarming around my head like a swarm of angry bees, I could almost hear the buzzing as if it was a tangible thing.

“Ah… No real reason. I thought if I came to a small town, like this, that it would be safer. From the Demons, the Angels… my family, just to escape I guess. Why?” I turned sceptical, my voice wary as I looked at the sisters with caution.

“I don’t know how to –” Natalie began before Eva cut her off, mid-sentence.

“This place is crawling with other Hunters, Demon and Angel the like. This town, Daxton, isn’t just any small place for you to hide out – or whatever it is you’re exactly doing – it’s more like a place Hunter come to get some action. There’s a huge-scale war going on here. Between Hunters, Demons and Angels. This is a place where it doesn’t matter what you Hunt, but what’s after you. There’s no getting out of it now, you’re stuck here.

“I’ve heard a few… interesting things about Daxton, things about the war. They say that Demon blood was mixed with Angel blood here, and that’s what they’re fighting over – who’s blood dominates. Apparently the fused blood was injected into something – human, Hunter, Angel or Demon, no one knows – and whoever wins this war will have rein over those who have the injected blood. They call them the Undecided; they’re meant to be dangerous, crazy powerful. Strong, smart, fast, skilful – in every way. Devious like the demons and beauty to compete with that of an Angels, darkness and a light is mixed in within them. They are torn between the two Bloods, impossible to choose what they must – they are enslaved to their own blood.

“What I really want to know is who’s gonna win and whether it’s all gonna be worth it. A lot of Hunters have died – willing and unwilling – in this war. And I’m starting to think that maybe your siblings might know a thing or two about this.”


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Thu May 29, 2014 10:05 pm
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KnightTeen wrote a review...



Annnd I'm back! I have to say, just glancing at this, it looks good!

...jostling me on the spot, and it took all my resolve not to snap and hit one of them – or all of them.


Added a little something there.


I'm a little less confused now that I have read that ending. I have to say that I really like what you have written here.

It's not really something that I have ever seen before. Addmittedly, I did think that this was going to be like Supernatural because of the brothers and the Hunters, but I can see that it's not, the book is it's own thing.

And that's really cool.

I don't really have anything bad to say about this chapter, just the one issue that I pointed out up there.

Can't wait for the next chapter!

~Teen~






Thanks. Well I did rush this one a bit. But cause I'm feeling really ill at the moment I should be able to write for most of the weekend. I might make it a little shorter so I can get it posted quicker.

But thank you for everything!





Just encase you wanted to know I posted that Prologue finally....



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Thu May 29, 2014 4:17 pm
AmorEtOdium wrote a review...



I’m not going to have this review as long as the review before (I am going for 1000 characters, though, because I love to write and that requires a lot of points). If I seem to blab, then I’m very sorry. I’m probably also going to have little to say about this chapter. You already seem like a great writer (like said earlier, you remind me of me when I started writing, and I was much better then than now.)

I notice that you change point of view (POV) often, and sometimes, it’s necessary to do that. However, if you have to change it within a chapter, then it could possibly be a problem. I know a lot of people who would rather read third person omniscient than have POV change in a chapter. Some these people still prefer reading first person, but the changes of POV are problematic. It’s unnecessary confusion, to them and to me as well.

When you wrote “everything her and Claudia did”, did it feel awkward to read? I believe it should be “everything she and Claudia did”. It doesn’t sound right in my head, nor when I say it aloud.

I’m also cringing right now. You used a typical cheerleader stereotype with Hailey, which makes me feel like you might be a little scared to step outside of the box. I’m not saying you should change it, since it’s a pet peeve of mine, but it does seem a little amateur to me.

Okay, I’m not going to add anymore, but I suggest reading over the whole thing again. There are some simple mistakes that have easy fixes! Nothing too bad; nothing that would take rearranging all the structure either.






Thanks. I was rushing a bit with this chapter so I didn't really read over it.

Hailey is meant to be like this, very typical and everything of the like. It makes it easier to then compare her to Renee. But I understand what you mean.

Now as for the POV thing, I myself was originally going to write it in Walker's view only but the I started thinking about it. I decided that with some stuff that's going to happen it would be better to have it in multiple views. So yeah...




Look closely. The beautiful may be small.
— Immanuel Kant, Philosopher