Yellow Rose

First off, I absolutely love this poem. The deeper meaning to it is not only touching, but well presented. My only thing is sometimes the main idea seemed to kind of swerve or lose track for a bit. So basically watch out with where you're going whenever your writing. Everything else was amazing! You're word choice and the "yellow rose" concept was genius. Wonderful Job! ☺

hey there,

this piece of work of work is really....good...i completely understand the sentiment behind this poem...YELLOW ROSE...well smart choice of words to indicate wat you were feeling... i really connect to this poem... personally- i myself had a friendhip i used to cherish and be proud of but unfortunetly the string of its bound was really thin.... i understand how hard it is to say goodbye to someone you loved ones....isnt it true that one can hate someone so much but he can never hate him more than he love him....anyway this poem is really beautiful....

good work...

Hey EmptySoul! I'm MissLyricz and I'm going to be reviewing your poem!

What first caught my attention was indeed the title. I absolutely love yellow roses and what they symbolise! The description also captured my attention, so nice touch!

The poem was wonderfully written and the rhyming was well done. In some areas it does seem a bit disconnected from the overall flow, but it wasn't that obvious as the words in the poem were a distraction from this. So, I wouldn't worry too much about that.

This poem was deep, clearly personal and a great read, I thoroughly enjoyed it! Continue to write, my friend, and never give up!

I look forward to reading the many more works that you will compose in the future!


MissLyricz x

I like how this is based on the classic symbol of the yellow rose of friendship, and it's also interesting that the rose is symbolizing the friendship itself, not the friend, as shown by
" wept for our lost yellow rose", which is an interesting way to say that you've lost the person, not the relationship.
The rhyme scheme makes the poem flow nicely, however, it is uneven. There are some lines that rhyme, and some that don't, which makes the poem feel disjointed. I'm not sure if this is what you were after. The last line simply being "bye bye" is sort of jarring, which makes me think that it was intentional- it's sort of a surprise, because you would expect the last line to fit in with the rest of the poem- long, elegant lines.

There's some cliches in here- for example, "nothing lives forever", "I helped you through tough times", "when life was giving me limes", etc. These kind of make the poem feel campy and insincere. I'm sure that you could find ways to connect the idea of a yellow rose more to this lost friendship in this poem, like talking about the rose more. You could get into some interesting metaphors, such as thorns and whatnot.

Overall, I really liked the idea of this poem and the symbol of the yellow rose, but it could use some pruning(get it? lol). I hope to read more from you!