Young Writers Society

Hello, I would like to start by saying this is very a strong poem. You have some very strong imagery hence Autumn Winds but I wish we got to see a little more. Perhaps you could have added little moments to show the effects like being in your room and mentally beating yourself up or eating alone ( Of course I don't know the backstory of this piece.) but I feel that would heighten the emotion of this poem and it pop. Regardless I enjoyed it very much and love the themes you trying to convey as it is very soft without stripping it of the anger people can feel growing up or living like this.

Keep it up.

Hiii!

I'm not exaggerating when I say I savoured every sentence of this poem. The feelings you talk about are so real and personal to me. At first, you talk about how the world is chaotic and corrupt. And if goodness still exists, it's rare. The first few lines are about how life diminishes the innocence that everyone is born with. It's also about a need to be good enough, maybe to be perfect. Because you have to put on a happy face for others, while you're not happy inside, and you don't know how to be happy.
And the finish is perfect.

"You deserve a love that is deeper than the ocean."

Hello, Ellie! Wist here with a review. I am so excited to review something from you. This poem demonstrates a powerful feeling that hit me straight in the feels. The tone, the writing, the message. My heart is crying, Ellie. With that said, let's get into it.

Because every time you mess up,
you fail at being the one person
who you thought you could trust.

You are willing to die for your own sins,
and carry the cross of your enemies,
and still, you smile.
Secretly, you cry.

You can't ask for help
because you have always been the helper.

You deserve a love that is deeper than the ocean.