Published March 29, 2008
The middle of two worlds lies in slumber now,
But If my mind was to wander, which it eventually does-
I find myself amongst those September days, waiting.
Waiting for you to come, for the anticipation to ascend into
little more than a sigh or a promise, soaking in the tangy taste of
salt lips and suspicious clear skies…of a snatch at the slipping sand of
what I like to call childhood. And what you call a day.
But you don’t see the world like I do, a jumble of excitement and-
half hearted disappointment, tied together by an endless search for inspiration,
A need to relate to something, a shadow, anything.
You see the world through an empty, poisonous grin.
For things, even your troubles come and go easily,
You wave at them whilst they fly past.
And I am left to stumble in your jelly sandal wake,
Yet I need you more than I admit.
To lead the way through the clouds, and to show
Me that place. Our place where we’ll met tomorrow.
And you’ll show me your world all over again,
And shade my face with your hand,
From the scorching sun of my own.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
I'm jealous of your title because it would be perfect for a piece of mine...damn you....

...but yes. Its great writing. So I guess I can't stay mad.
The inspiration for this is my best friend. She keeps me from going insane, and our days togther are usually in the summer time- when I try to get away from writing because it drives me crazy.
Thanks very much for the comments,
Eimear
Very good it flowed and was beautiful. One of the few poems I've seen so far to actually have a good word choice and flow with depth and not whine or lament about romance in a bland way. Was good and the imagery was nice.
Have a gold star! *stick*
I loved that line.
Wow. Awesome use of language.
I really liked this poem. You clearly have a lot of talent, and as last mohican said, you obviously spent a lot of time and care on this, and I’m also curious where the inspiration from this came. Nice work.
Interesting images and ideas. I thought it was well written and you obviously put thought and effort into each word. I really liked it, but I'm curious to know what inspired it for you. Great work! ~LM