Published August 31, 2026
All That is Gold Is Mine
“A cruel lord?” some whispered.
“Must’ve been a foreigner,” some responded. “You know them northerly moorish types, always throwing their weight around, the fat bastards,” they snorted.
“Maybe he was from the mountains, you know, one of the short-folk. Whatchamacallem…” one wondered. “Dovalay?” he grasped for the word. “I hear they’re mighty rude to us ‘sunsuckers’,” he gave up on finding the word.
“Or maybe he was from the west! Those are strange lands, I tell you!” an older man, older perhaps even than Geoffrey, chirped up.
“The West Riding? Them’s normal folk!” countered another.
“No, you fool! From beyond the Morburgs! The westmen are highminded and cruel to a one!” the original theorist responded. The Morburgs, or as Shayar knew them, the Eazims, formed the north western border of Dunwenn and beyond them lay endless pine forests and open fields that broke only at the Gold Coast. The westmen were kind, but there was no accounting for the tales of rural folks!
“Silence now!” Shayar shouted without scolding. “Do you want to hear my story or make your own? I am quite happy to listen to your weavings too, Valeford!” his mock-scowl was replaced with his usual smile.
The crowd fell silent and listened again, as Shayar plucked his tune and sung his notes.
ⱡ
“A pity,” Lord Kademos Jadd stood with crossed arms in the empty rooms of his daughter. “A real pity,” the man, short but well built, turned to his wife. “I suppose she has run off to the wizard,” he sighed. “She thinks we still do not know.”
“She is a fool, Kademos,” his wife, Lady Ikal Jadd, rolled her eyes. Her hair was as blonde as their daughter’s, and she was as slender as her too.
“She knows,” Kademos folded his arms. Beads of sweat, for the castle was warmer than the spring day outside, formed on his scalp, in his short hair, and dripped slowly down his face. “She knows, I am certain. She saw that I wore not my ring,” he thumbed the forefinger on his right hand which was bereft its golden ring.
Lady Ikal, irritated, said “how can she know? What does the foolish girl know of the ring? Nothing!”
“Leave it, you cat,” at this Lady Ikal was calmed for it was a term of endearment to her, though to others it may have been insult or offense, and Kademos smiled as he spoke. “I should first take care of the gate guards.” So saying, he turned and left the room, making for the barracks, his crimson cape billowing in his wake.
When he came to the barracks, the Captain of the Wall approached him. “They are inside, your Lordship.” Without acknowledging the man, Kademos went inside and, in the centre of the barracks, found the two gate guards held prisoner.
“You failed in your duty. My daughter has escaped, and she can cause great harm to me.” The gate guards were young, both younger than 20, and they trembled in fear for their comrades looked upon them with disgust and disdain. “What a pity, truly,” Kademos gave a tired sigh. “Throw them from the ramparts, make sure the village sees.”
The gate guards gave a scream of terror and they did not stop screaming as they were dragged away by their brothers in arms. The Captain of the Wall spoke, then, to Kademos. “Shall I send a party after her? I believe she rode north. Accompanying her was a free knight, or so it seemed.”
Kademos looked upon the Captain with a suspicion that nearly sealed the soldier’s fate. “How do you know this?”
“I have scouts, Sir, rangers that is – on the peripheries of the old forest. They saw a young woman and knight ride into the older parts. Who else would take that road?”
“Careful, Captain,” Kademos spoke with venom, “for I have no use for traitors in my midst.” After a moment had passed, Kademos left the barracks and made for the ramparts where he caught the last moments of the gate guards’ final seconds of life as they, pleading and begging their unmoved friends, were hurled from the walls. Six horns were sounded, three for each execution.
“You,” Kademos grabbed a watchman by his collar. “You are now a sergeant at arms,” the watchman, surprised, babbled in thanks but Kademos didn’t care. “The tax collector is going down at noon today – go with him. There is a threat to his life from some foreign cutthroat that’s hanging about in Ash Square. I want to hear three more horns by lunch time, understood?”
The sergeant at arms feebly nodded and slinked away upon being released. Kademos stood there a while, surveying the village underneath him, and his thoughts turned to the Knights of the Keep. He had known them all his life, and perhaps he ought to have been loyal to them – but there were things more valuable in life than the outmoded ideas of loyalty and duty, and the Knights were too stuck-in-the-mud to see that. Still, he had cried in silence the night he sent them off. Then he had slept, and had dreamt of a dragon’s hoard.
*
As Kademos ate, there came nine horns.
“The new sergeant-at-arms seems eager,” he noted as he chased down roast duck with red wine. “I sent him only to string up one bugger, he’s given me three.”
“Foreign, again?” Lady Ikal grinned.
“Of course – it’s the best way to get them to turn on each other. That’s what he’d said, remember? They shall turn and burn, as wails rise in red skies.” Kademos swallowed yet more roast duck. “The augur.”
“Oh, I do wish you’d give that augury nonsense up! All this dragon nonsense will be the end of you, I swear it. What use have we of a dragon when entire companies would throw themselves at you for a year’s stipend?”
Kademos nodded in half-agreement. Sitting on and taxing the Iron Road had made him rich beyond compare, certainly in South Frain, and the quality of his men-at-arms and militiamen was beyond reproach.
“But no, my darling husband must turn to some crackpot mystic’s smoked-up ramblings. I swear to Banc, why did you give up your mother’s ring for that nonsense?” she downed sweet wine and spoke again. “And even if dragons were real, why would one heed your call?”
“Because!” Kademos erupted suddenly. “I command a dragon’s hoard already, and what dragon will not want to call it its own?”
“Then surely the dragon will attack us!” Lady Ikal held her own.
“It can try,” Kademos gave a dark smile.
“What did you do?”
“That madman in his forest tower is not the only wizard in these parts, my darling wife,” he rose without finishing his meal, and the shadows in the dining room grew dark as night.
“What did you do?” Lady Ikal got to her feet, face a mix of anger and fear.
“Come now,” Kademos sat back down, his smile ordinary. “Trust me, my cat, for I have made certain our long lives shall be rich and plentiful.”
“No,” Lady Ikal turned to leave. “If you do not tell me this instant what you have done, then I shall leave. And do not think I will not, for I will make south to the Wisen City and I shall tell the Arch-Mages there of your foolishness!”
“I’m afraid I cannot tell you more,” he spoke slowly. His mind had been made in that instant, and already tears began to well in his eyes. “Know that this breaks my heart, my cat, and I shall never be whole again.”
He sprang up and leapt onto his wife, weeping as he did so. Silently and swiftly, with the quiet thrust of a single dagger, he killed her and wept atop her corpse.
ⱡ
Shayar looked at the village before him, for now the whole village had gathered indeed, and awaited their response. People, he had found, responded oddly to gruesome villains and acts – sometimes they booed the villain, other times they were silent, rarer still they were enraged, but most often they simply shook their heads in disgust as if to make it known that they disagreed with the villain.
Valeford, however, did none of these. Some sang a lament under their breath, an old lament known as Banc’s Farewell, while others rolled their eyes. Everyone was a-whisper, however, for there was nothing Valeford liked more than a good story!
“What a pointless act of cruelty, honestly,” one of the eye-rollers muttered. “It wasn’t as if she would have actually gone down to those madmen and blabbed!”
“I say!” another responded. “But, as folk say, there’s nowt among thieves but dishonour.”
“Well, I hope he gets it!” shouted an enthusiastic young man, though he was trying to whisper. “I could not imagine harmin’ my wife, leave alone guttin’ her like a fish!”
Someone snorted, “he just stabbed her!”
That was booed quite a bit.
Then Shayar spoke. “Old Kademos was an evil man, alright, but does anyone here know what his name means?” This question had the chattering crowd at once silenced and stumped for an answer.
Then, in the back, beside Geoffrey, a hand shot up.
“Young Alfie!” Shayar called on the boy. “Go on, give me your best guess,” he grinned.
“Does it mean evil spirit in Hesic?” asked the boy. Shayar glanced at Geoffrey, who beamed with pride.
“Why, Alfie, yes it does! You see, Kademos wasn’t his real name – his real name was far too boring for me to remember. Doesn’t Kademos fit him better?”
The crowd shouted in unison; “YES!”
“Now, let us turn back to the forest, far to the north, hmm?” the crowd murmured and settled down as Shayar began to strum a tune on his sitar.
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A Butterfly has landed to review your work! <3
Hey Dom! A Butterfly has landed to review your work, and Chapter 3 does change the tone. We finally get to see Kademos, and this man is something special. I also enjoyed the way Shayar and the crowd react to the story as it adds a nice layer to the legend being told.
The Egg
The opening with the crowd debating the origins of the "cruel lord" was very fun. It makes Valeford feel like a proper community and not just an audience listening to Shayar.
I also enjoyed the way you managed to sneak some world building into their conversation about the north, west, mountains, and the various peoples beyond the borders. It makes the world feel much larger than just the Vale.
The Caterpillar Hatches
And we meet Kademos.
You did well to introduce his character at the beginning by establishing what his biggest concern was. That the first thing on his agenda was Serafina knowing too much tells us exactly the kind of man we're dealing with.
There's a constant undercurrent of him measuring what everyone he meets knows and how it would benefit or hinder him.
Growing & Molting
The conversation with the gate guards is where I really saw how far Kademos was willing to go to. He isn't simply an unpleasant ruler, but one who sees people as disposable when they become inconvenient.
What I enjoyed most was that you didn't make him completely unfeeling. The thoughts about the Knights of the Keep complicate things slightly by showing he did care about them, but made a choice to pursue his ambitions anyway.
It makes him more interesting than a simple evil lord who does evil things.
Spinning the Chrysalis
The dining hall conversation with Lady Ikal was probably my favourite part of the chapter.
She asks questions instead of accepting what he says about the dragon, and challenges his assumptions.
That is exactly what I was thinking too.
And Kademos' answer about having a dragon's hoard immediately raises questions as to how he acquired it and his true motives.
The Transformation
The reveal that he has involved another wizard was a great way to raise the stakes. It makes the dragon plan feel much more plausible.
Then we have the conversation taking a very dark turn.
I think it was clever the way you contrasted the way Kademos spoke affectionately to his wife to what he eventually decided to do. His use of "my cat" almost makes it worse by having a strange tenderness juxtaposed against his willingness to do horrible things.
Wings Taking Shape
I also enjoyed getting to see Shayar's part of the story again after leaving Kademos. The audience reactions make it feel like a performance rather than us simply reading a chapter being told to us.
The villagers' reactions are also funny in places, especially the person correcting the description of what happened. It gives the audience its own personality rather than being a collective group.
Breaking Free
The reveal about Kademos' name was a neat little detail.
Shayar's confirmation makes me wonder about the hidden meanings of the other names in the story. It also fits in nicely with the personality of the storyteller to deliberately choose a name that has a better meaning than his own.
First Flight
Ending with Shayar returning everyone to the forest was great. We've witnessed the major turning point in Kademos' life, and are now being led back towards Tauth and Serafina.
I'm especially curious about what is happening with the blackmaws and if they're going to expose anything about the forest.
Favorite Nectar
My favourite part of this chapter was the two sides of the coin. While Tauth and Serafina are in the forest dealing with the threat and learning more about each other, Kademos is making increasingly terrible decisions believing he can control everything.
Shayar manages to bind both sides together beautifully.
Also, the interaction with the crowd continues to be one of my favourite parts of this novella. It makes the whole thing feel like an old legend that people have discussed and interpreted for generations.
Lovely work, Dom! Kademos is the kind of character I enjoy hating, and now I'm really curious what this dragon's hoard contains. <3
Me again!
What I liked about this chapter is that it introduces Kademos as an enemy more thoroughly and shows how much he is ready to do to reach his aims. It works really well due to the conversation between him and Ikal that starts quite unexpectedly friendly.
The other thing I liked about this chapter is the fact that Shayar keeps telling the story. The villagers’ reaction to it makes it feel like a shared experience of some kind instead of just a narration. Also, it is good that we have another moment where Alfie interacts with Shayar.
In general, I would say that Kademos is probably the most powerful element of this chapter. His readiness to sacrifice his soldiers, deceive his people, and kill his wife makes him a truly cruel person without any need to tell that he is an evil one.
The ending fits well as it manages to bring the story back to Shayar and the forest trek. In addition, the funny episodes between the villagers help not make the chapter too bleak.
There are several sentences that can be improved in terms of grammar and coherence, but as a whole, this chapter does a good job of building Kademos as an intimidating force and at the same time developing the world further.
Thanks, man!
> There are several sentences that can be improved in terms of grammar and coherence, but as a whole, this chapter does a good job of building Kademos as an intimidating force and at the same time developing the world further.
Can you give me a couple examples? It's been like 3 months since I wrote this and I can't remember lmao
Of course! Some examples that I came across included:“The gate guards gave a scream of terror and they did not stop screaming as…” — this feels a little awkward because of the repetition of “scream/screaming.” It could be phrased more smoothly.
“Then he had slept and dreamed of the dragon’s hoard.” — the transition here feels slightly abrupt, especially because of the change from his emotional reaction to the dream.
Ty! New chapter is up btw