Well i just asked my dad...probably not much help considering he has the IQ of a small dog....Sorry dad! anyway he thinks they do, so does one of my other mates...it probably is just a kiwi accent thing so i'll work on it! try make it universal! Lol
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Watch the sunset with me,
Take me by the hand.
Brush away the tears,
Tell me that you understand.
Show me that you love me,
Hold me close at night.
Smile when you I call you,
Prove to me its right.
Write my name in hearts,
Colour them in pink.
Whisper all your dreams,
Tell me what you think.
Hold me when I need you,
Catch me when I fall.
Make footprint in my heart,
Boy you need to do it all.
Share with me your secrets,
Show me your ideas.
Kiss my forehead in the morning,
Confide in me your fears.
Then maybe I’ll forgive you,
While I sit and cry at night.
And maybe we’ll make up,
Get past the ugly fight.
But I can’t promise a thing,
If you don’t tell me that you care,
And I can’t hold you close.
If you’re never near.
So before you say you love me,
Think before you talk,
Because baby if you play me.
This girl is ganna walk.
Then you’ll realise what you’ve lost,
It will break you little heart,
And you’d wish you’d really meant it.
Cause boy it’ll tear you apart.
So listen to my warning,
Because I want you so.
Do the things I tell you,
Or I’ll have to let you go.
Well i just asked my dad...probably not much help considering he has the IQ of a small dog....Sorry dad! anyway he thinks they do, so does one of my other mates...it probably is just a kiwi accent thing so i'll work on it! try make it universal! Lol
Thanks Ladydark,
I will try and think of another way of wording that stanza.
care/near doesnt work out
nice poem, I don't really suggest on poems since I can't write or correct them, but this I do understand there are some words you could change...
But I can’t promise a thing,
If you don’t tell me that you care,
And I can’t hold you close.
If you’re never near.
this could be changed, the second verse is a wee bit to long, and if you make most of the stanzas rhyming this should rhyme as well, care/near doesnt work out, makes the poem seem a bit halted right about there. Unless ye meant to do that, but meh. roughly, good job, no doubt someone will point out stuff that I missed...
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