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POV You Are A Chicken Who Just Made It Back From Town

by Corvid

You’ve just made it back when the other birds come clucking,

brushing hard-earned dust from feathers and

asking their questions of people and their problems

how’d you cross the road and why

why are they asking.

you hold the silence in your crop,

a basket of fresh strawberries

in your tired, wearied beak.

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235 Reviews

Points: 6841
Reviews: 235

Wed Feb 08, 2023 12:34 am
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4revgreen wrote a review...

I love this little poem! It just conjured up this cute little town of chickens and a tired mother chicken out doing the chores or something aha. Although it's short the language you used really does creates a clear and vivid picture in my mind; phrases such as "brushing hard-earned dust from feathers" and "a basket of fresh strawberries in your tired, wearied beak" are so subtly vivid and really spark the imagination to view this scene in my head.

I also like how the poem seems pretty open to interpretation, allowing the reader to make their own connections and find personal meaning in the words. For example, I kind of saw the basket of strawberries held in the bird's crop to perhaps symbolise the experiences and knowledge they gained on the journey, and that the other chickens will only know once they'd crossed the road themselves. Like someone with more knowledge withholding it from the young so they gain their own experiences.

Overall, I really enjoyed your short, chicken themed poem! Keep writing :-)

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16 Reviews

Points: 674
Reviews: 16

Tue Feb 07, 2023 11:48 pm
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emilyrebecca wrote a review...

I'm not 100% whether you meant this as a joke, but let me tell you, I hope it is not. I really loved this poem. It's simple and domestic (in a strange chicken-y way) and the easygoing style is very pleasant to read. It's also a little bit comedic, a little bit philosophical, and again very, very good! I'll admit, I did have to look up the definition of "crop" in regards to chickens, but what I found was very interesting and I applaud you on your chicken anatomy knowledge. Speaking of the quote below, I love it. It took me a minute to really understand it in the context, but the metaphor is really a seamless one. My only real criticism, is a think this could have multiple more stanzas describing this domestic chicken life and I would happily read any more of this "Chicken Verse" any day.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this and I hope this was at all helpful to you!
-emilyrebecca 🌹

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.
— Henry David Thoreau, "Walden"