my tongue is dry now,
my cheeks are salty from tears,
my thoat is clogged with unspoken words.
ti prego, non lasciarmi
i tried to find you.
stumbling through the dark,
i kept eyes peeled for your blue cap.
ti prego, non ho finito
the air was heavy all around me,
the sound of laughter
like a bullet to my ears.
ti prego, aiuta mi, aiuta mi
i wished for the feeling
of raw, bitten lips and your mouth
tracing patterns in my neck.
ti prego, bacia mi, bacia mi
i thought i saw you,
i ran towards the lean body and waved,
i was ready to let finnaly let myself go.
ti prego, non perdermi adesso
but it was just another somebody.
not even very like you, in retrospect.
and it makes my heart
stop
to imagine you left thinking i didn't care.
i bite my inner lip and let the taste of metal
soak up the taste of no goodbye.
ti prego, non lasciarmi
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
I'm guessing ti prego means I beg of you heh
I liked it a lot, in fact I'll read it again... and comment better another day, it's so early here...
I like the language... I think it's Latin or Italian. Actually, it's probably Italian. But still! I like how it combines. For me, it reminds me of a cathedral, which is quite impressive, even if I haven't the slightest of what the words actually mean.
Still, my main problem was you didn't capialize your i's. And I know that poetry is a lot looser and you technically don't have to capitalize anything, but in this case, I think that it would work a little better.
Nice stuff in any case!
you don't need the "now". it's extra.
blue cap? an odd image.
otherwise, i loved the ending and the repition of italian at the ends of the line. they all make sense with each other. it's actually quite beautiful.