Young Writers Society

This requires...

sigh.

OK - you have some basic problems. Firstly, and I'll get the small issues out of the way first, the spelling and grammar are appalling: about three-quarters of your lines have one or more bad mistakes.

I've known you for a while i guess...
about a 8 years orso.
And i think now is the time for you to know.
I think your special in every way.

I wonder if I'll ever tell you this,
Cuz just before you know, you've allready walked outside that door..
You'll leave me cold and lonely..
An overbooked heart, with lots of strong feelings to cary

So yeah next year you'll be gone,
Another lost person..
yeah,you'll stand in line..
The line to all the lost people I'll lose by that time

That's them mostly highlighted.

The problems are way deeper than that, though: this just isn't poetic. You have no rhythm: the lines are however long you feel like, there's been absolutely no attempt to make it scan. What you have done, and I see it so incredibly often, is taken a paragraph of writing and hit the enter key a few times. This does NOT make it poetry. It should flow, the lines should be shortened/lengthened so that it reads well.

Secondly: your use of punctuation. You've used ".." so, so many times, and it just doesn't cut the mustard in decent writing. On the incredibly rare occasion that you're going to use something like this, do it properly - it's called an ellipse, and it's three dots: "..."
Apart from that, you stick fullstops and comma in where they just break up the poem and make it choppy, like having one at the end of every line in the first stanza. Then when you do need them you leave them out, like the ends of both the second and third verses. You need to think very carefully about why you're putting the commas, full-stops and (semi-)colons into your poem, and why they're there. Unfortunately, there's very little point to this until you've sorted out your line length and structure in general.

Thirdly and finally: find something else to write about. The sooner every teenager who's had a bad relationship, lost love or painful break-up learns that the world frankly doesn't care, the better. There are exceptional poems about love and loss: that's because they're written by exceptional poets, and that skill sets them apart from angst.

Find something original to write about; give it some rhythm when you read it out loud; think about where the full stops and other punctuation should go to add to that; then, finally, write a poem that is beautiful and makes us see stunning pictures and think new thoughts. That is learning to write poetry: not writing badly structured prose and giving it a cheap mask.

First off, fix your grammar and spelling. But that's already been said, so I'll leave that and continue. You don't get a very strong beginning when you end your first line with "i guess..." If you really like it though, please drop the "..." and capitalize the "I". I don't like reading a poem that starts off with bad English usage. Also: you don't have to end every line with a period. For example, in the first stanza:

And i think now is the time for you to know.
I think your special in every way.

It would sound much better if you wrote, instead:
And I think it now is the time to let you know
That I think you're special in every way.
It's not a very powerful statement, but it does at least sound better without the unnecessary pause.
One more thing: in my opinion, words such as "cuz" and "so yeah" don't really belong in a poem like this. It's an emotional work and slang (or whatever you feel like calling them) wordings really detract from your overall effect. I think you should try rewriting this with the same idea, but just different wording (and better grammar and spelling ). It could be a powerful poem. Keep writing!