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Young Writers Society


12+

L'ange de la Mort

by CatInTheShower


A stale breeze swept coarse through the City borough, lacerating streets riddled with debris. Upon the few steeples which refrained from collapse the sun rested, casting a blood orange glow over a torn Paris. A glow which seeped like the sweat and grime of revolution into the gaps between stained cobbles. Lone corpses, haphazardly scattered amongst the rubble, fermented in the twilight warmth as flies gathered to glut upon lost souls. Such is the revolution of the people, for it is the people who bear the turmoil of war, the people who sacrifice for supposed reforms, the people whose rotten flesh lay tattered to the rats, slain by the fire of oppression. Soon the light would lay to rest over the stricken city, yet no rest came to the turmoil.

Six gongs the cathedral bells chimed to the square. Timed notes evanesced into the receding daylight unregarded by the chaos unfurling beneath. All attention lay acute upon a stock improvised stage and its stark caricatures. A gaunt mahogany frame commanded both the raised platform and the will of the crowd, its hollow, blackened shadow hanging over the mob like Death's void. Collaborative shouts were dictated by the consecutive swipes of a sharpened blade through the pungent air. The wretched reek of burning powder seemed not to soothe their appetite for destruction and amassed, they chanted for the blood of retribution.

Ten minutes past read the clock tower, a display shared by an ornate watch glistening in a gloves hand, its cold heart beating incessantly. Leather bound fingers sailed over the metallic casing, swiftly ceasing the timekeeper's motion. Once, he knew, it had been the possession of his father, an heirloom that never abandoned the grace of his side. Humbly he withdrew his hand to the decoratively stitched pocket of a sapphire tailcoat and carefully restored the silver accessory to it. A sluggish shudder awoke him from his poignant trance and he set sore eyes upon the smouldering heavens above him. Hawks adorned the cathedral spires, witness to the deliverance below, and he wondered if they understood the justice upon the ground, he the adjudicator.

Gradually, the mob grew tense for a built up release; a spark dashing upon the fuse to an inevitable climax. What fanatical hunger lay behind these ragged colours? A thirst for the tenets of constitution glorified by the disputes of Liberty, Equality and Fraternity. Such a declaration perverted by those whose eyes gaze only upon the throne. Liberty; the guillotine stood free to command. Equality; fellowship split by the blade of accusation. Fraternity; brother divided in resolution. All reflected in besmirched flags, streaked with scum and blood. Only a distorted society could find hope in such an emblem; a society on the brink of annihilation.

He scanned the fervent gathering through sore, swollen eyes, edged with salty tears. Men, women, children he all saw; observers to grotesque events. A dagger pressed through the rough hemp of his tattered garment urged him forth to his cue in the vile theatre. A flare of light darkened his vision, until his surroundings formed like a dreamy haze upon the stage. He glanced to blemished hands, finding them charred and dry with filth, shaking from the chill of abhorrence. An authoritative drawl severed his pondering and to the swarm of people his "crimes" were proclaimed, each whimsical action governing appalled howls. He raised his head and eyed the towering figure of his executioner; a remorseless demon. "L'ange de la Mort" those who saw sense to perceive past his democratic facade christened him. The patches of velvet blood stained upon his uniform, he wore as medals, shimmering against his crest. The strains by which this malevolent corruption abides were not for false citizenship, but for his thirst for power. One final fleeting glimpse he caught of "L'ange" before being locked into the hellish device; a sapphire tailcoat and a silver clockwork breathing in a gloved hand. The Reaper's Adjudicator.

What was it the people saw in these mindless massacres? No justice could be derived from the slaughter of innocence, the rush of the scythe, the elimination of all "evils". In a single flashing moment, the angular blade rang, falling to a merciless demise. A monstrous roar, fuelled by the joy of vengeance, evoked from the rose haze. Perhaps, if they knew the terror-stricken thoughts lost in the limp head rolling awkwardly across the stage, they would not see victory. Life's scarlet essence dripped solemnly down the frame, etching the tale into the knots of the wood, tainting a bloody hue. A young woman broke forth from the crowd, her eyes adorned with tears of loss, her tongue with begs. Only the vehement crack of flintlocks answered her pleas and she collapsed, her slight stature falling lifeless to the stones. With haste, a ravenous pack engulfed the corpse, tearing apart fresh limbs. Earthly possessions fed the growing havoc as her lame head became impaled for display. Raised above the revolution, she stared poignantly into the light as if awaiting a better peace. Such is the will of the people. Such is the people's revolution. 


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Points: 313
Reviews: 7

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Mon Jun 01, 2015 3:10 am
Hannawrites wrote a review...



This piece was so full of beautiful imagery in a very un-beautiful situation. The ending really sunk its teeth into the reader, I love this piece. The french revolution is one of my favorite periods of history, the book Les Miserables is what really sparked that love for me, and I think Victor Hugo would tip his hat to you and share some of you feelings about the revolution really just a well done piece thank you for sharing!




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28 Reviews


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Thu May 21, 2015 4:59 pm
Deleted4 says...



You are amazing, but you know that already:P Please keep writing (Cause you do get quite lazy) especially during the summer and next year! You're running out of excuses, and you're too talented to discard them story ideas brewing in that head;)






Who are you...? :P ED!



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37 Reviews


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Wed May 20, 2015 7:37 pm
wickedlygoodwriter wrote a review...



hello! wow that was amazing! the descriptions were on point and just the right amount. it had a nice historical kinda steampunk feel to it. you really tied up all end of the story yet you also left it very open for reader to wonder and enjoy. it was a very beautiful piece and had lots of felling. the way you switch perspectives and tell the story is just breathtaking. i would love to see more like this.




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48 Reviews


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Wed May 20, 2015 12:47 am
WeasleyDragonStar wrote a review...



I love it! The descriptive language is so utterly beautiful--decorated writing is one of my favorite-ist things in the world! One could argue that there needs to be more varied sentence lengths and formats, but I know how hard it can be to get out of the habit of having long and purple descriptions--I do it all the time (underline 'all')! I like the 4th paragraph, with liberty, equality, and fraternity...I like the parallel descriptions. And I love the French Revolution. Maybe this is inspired by Les Miserables?
I love the absolute melancholy tone and descriptions of the morbid corpses and injured beings. The words you choose for the setting are very appropriate and fitting. I love how transparent the emotions are in this piece...very well done. Keep writing!






Thanks so very much :D




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