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Young Writers Society


16+ Language

Am I Truly Innocent?

by BrokenSkye


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.

I just want love, that's all it is.
To feel it, hold it, embrace it.
Like it was when I had you.
I never could let go.

But it isn't right.
It goes against morals,
laws, and the world's view.
I am young, innocent,
that's what they say.
But they just don't understand,
you didn't target me.
I targeted you.

Even though you found me,
added me, through some social network,
I wanted you more than anything.
I would have done anything,
to keep you all to myself.
And that is exactly what I did.

I would sneak behind my parents backs,
just to steal some kisses from you.
But I stole more than just kisses.
I got exactly what I wanted.
You fulfilled the lust that I craved.
And I will never say it wasn't worth it.

With the twist of my hips,
you were all over me.
And I loved it, every minute of it.
Like I had control over you,
with just my body.

But then something happened,
I felt something falling.
I didn't understand,
that I was falling for you.
That this was blossoming,
from guilty lust into innocent love.

I wish I could say it didn't happen.
Then I wouldn't beat myself up over this,
over getting caught in the act,
of fucking on the bathroom floor.
Wouldn't beat myself up over your future.
Your rape charges and prison time.

Three years isn't that long,
but we had to work for that little.
Lying, deceiving the court and it's people.
But I would do anything to hold on.
It is my light in the darkness.
And if I can't have you in the end? 
Then I will end it all.

These people just don't understand,
I targeted you, but walk around unpunished.
I called for you, begged for you,
and you are in trouble now for answering me.
I want you. I will not end this,
and if it is to end, then I am to end.

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157 Reviews

Points: 22293
Reviews: 157

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Sun Mar 31, 2013 6:07 pm
ERZA wrote a review...



Hey I will be your reviewer today....

First lets talk about the basic concept of this poem...like what it makes me feel about it....
This poem so surely in a rhythm.....like it has a lucid and a smooth flow to it.....it also is very beautiful yet dark and twisted....it also radiates so much darkness and grey love too...like the white love is tainted by the darkness...if you know what I mean....

Secondly let me say about rhe things you could imprive on.....
Division of stanzas....you could divide them in an uniform manner to give it more rhythm....
Punctuations are alright and there are no spellung errors......GOOD JOB!!

Third and lastly,.....how I felt about it......
This poem is so nice and expressive....like a dark love story with a twist or something and its not at all sappy like the usual love stories....it feels so real yet so magical.....like all darkness was wiped away by a little white light which in the end turned grey but then the black darkness turnrd white....or something....

It has such a nice feel to it that I can somehow relate to it....eeveryrhing is personalized very well and in a proper way too....Overall.....GOOD WORK!!!

And yeah...even though I am not 16 yet...I have no problems with languages.....good luck and keep writing.......




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27 Reviews

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Reviews: 27

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Sun Mar 31, 2013 3:53 am
alanafiredancer wrote a review...



Hey Firedancer here to review your lovely poem!

Okay first thing first. This poem had a very flowing feel to it in my opinion. The first half of the poem was beautifully sad and enigmatic and then the last half was beautifully dark and twisted. I like that very much.

This poem gives me a real feel to the characters personality and as a result I can connect a lot easier with her. (Her? I'm just guessing here but I feel as if it's a her. Actually I am pretty sure that it's a her.) I love poems that I can connect to and that make me feel something, and this poem has made me feel something. My heart was aching for this young girl who had unintentionally fallen in love with a stranger.

The naivety of this girl is echoed in most teenage girls nowadays, and like I have said before, makes it much more relatable. Beautiful poem, just beautiful. You should submit it to your local newspaper and get recognized for this piece of work. I have really enjoyed it. Thank you so much for penning this poem.

Keep up the good work! :)




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33 Reviews

Points: 2574
Reviews: 33

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Sun Mar 31, 2013 2:02 am
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SkyeJane wrote a review...



Wow! This really has some power to it. I was riveted the whole way through by the end I felt my own emotions grow dark and full of swirling feelings.
So this story really unfolded for me because it really wasn't until I got a good ways in that I really understood what was happening.
At first it seemed pretty innocent almost;just a girl and a love she can't have.The when I really saw what was happening I was so lost for words because each word was so simple and pure and yet held so much power behind it.
The story really had me bound because even though I've never done anything like what was in the poem I could imagine how it felt..that need .that lust, the wanting and wanting. You really didn't need any grammatical frivolities because you used a language that did it all for you.
Your structure was nice an simple so it didn't get in the way of anything and basically the whole thing was just so well done! Really good Skye.....love Skyexxx





He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.
— Fredrich Nietzche (Philosopher)