A Riddle

by Blue_Rubies

Published November 9, 2009

The rose gold dragon roars, and spills
Wings as white as winters chills.
A thousand tiny specks of snow
Fly undecided, high and low
Disappearing one by one
Beneath the shadow of the sun

A raven cries from down below
A raucous cry like feet through snow
A glaring tale of hope long gone
He stops to think, and lurks along
Pacing 'round and chasing tails
So much thought to no avail

Deep within, a tiger lies,
With pale white fur, but molten eyes
Forever closing. Nearing death,
With one last cry, with one last breath
Can't save himself, and fades away
To all the other's deep dismay

Comments & reviews · 4
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Blue_Rubies
Comment
Blue_Rubies commented Comment · Nov 13, 2009

I guess it's not really the traditional cryptic riddle - it's more like painting a picture of the scene.

The Answer to the riddle:

Spoiler
A fire
Dragon=flames
White wings=ash
Raven=charcoal around the fire
Tiger=glowing embers

Random avatar
sobebomb
Review
sobebomb wrote a review Review · Nov 9, 2009

i riddle in how much this poem needs to be awesome? i dont get the title. other than that i loved it! the description was spot on but at the same time left a mystery to it. i wondered why it had to die. death is often talked of and it seems like a cliche' sometimes but over all i enjoyed this piece

User avatar
Demeter
Review
Demeter wrote a review Review · Nov 9, 2009

Hey Blue.

I have to say I quite liked this, because I'm a sucker for rhyming. :P I love it when rhymes don't sound forced, and I don't think they did in this! The title drew me in, but I would've liked to see something more riddle-y about this, and I'm sort of intrigued about why you chose this title. I'm sure it's something interesting, and I think you could bring it out more, for example by making the stanzas sound more like riddles.


The rose gold dragon roars, and spills
Wings as white as winters chills


This is the only part that was odd. (Too bad it's in the very beginning...) You don't really spill wings, you spread them, so this is just unlogical. I hope you find a way to replace it so that it will still rhyme, because it would be a pity if you didn't, seeing as the rest of the poem works the way it does.

I liked the mysterious mood about this – yes, it was what made it a riddle, perhaps, but I want more of it! :P Other than that, nice job, thanks for the read.


Demeter
x

MissMiaFacinelli wrote a review Review · Nov 9, 2009

Wow! This was such an awesome piece!

Rhyme scheme: check!
Cool language: check!
Grammar: great!
Punctuation: ah. This is where the poem falls down a little. There is no punctuation at the end of your lines, which means your readers can't breathe! Make sure you always punctuate the ends of lines, even if it is only a comma, it really helps your readers!

Besides that, great job!

Keep writing!

Mia x



Beware of advice—even this.
— Carl Sandburg