Young Writers Society

hey!

Here I am to review your wonderful poem!

I think this is my new favorite poem!!!!!!!
I just love all the lines, and the hole meaning of the poem.
You write really good, and you get very good writing ideas!
Just keep writing!!!!

Your friend, and fan

WriterSis<3

Hi bellarke!

I'm hiraeth, here to review this awesome poem!

so first, the line "i used to be heartless, before you became my light." yes, i'm kind of annoying, and nagging, but these two lines don't really go together, you know? like, you were heartless before, but now you're not, because you found light? so the emptiness that was there is now not there cuz its all light now? am i making sense? because when you're heartless, the only improvement that can happen is developing feelings and....well, finding a heart. the light part just sounds a bit redundant with the line where you wrote "you took my darkness and made it bright."

Next.

"Then, I meet you, you made my heart bright." there's a tense change here: 'meet' is in present tense, but the rest of the line and the rest of the poem is in past tense. so meet should be changed to 'met.

And my final nitpick: 'ride' in the second last line should be 'rid' no?

All these are very small mistakes, though, and happens once in while, so proofreading is very important (as i'm sure you know). Overall, though, this poem is VERY beautiful, really, don't mind my nitpicks, i'm just a grammar nerd.

keep writing, i hope to read more from you!

Henloo its Jade and I'm back with another review. You better feel special Bellarke because you are the first one I have done in a long time. So, you have been blessed with my presence.

Anyways, I really liked this poem and it was really good for the most part.
The first mistake I noticed was that you wrote this poem, Bell.. jK JK IM JUST KIDDING BB I LOVE YOU SO MUCHH <3

The aCTUAL first thing I noticed was the line, 'before you became my light.' this interrupted the smooth flow of the poem and kind of threw me off.
The stanza after that got it back into the right flow but it was still a little different.

But that doesnt last long once it gets to the next one. It is a little confusing to me because of how you put it. A suggestion would be, ' Then I met you and you made my heart spike'
Remember, it is just a suggestion. You dont have to use it, hon.

I really do like where the poem is coming from though and I think you are actually really talented. I love all your work and they are way better than what I could possibly do with poems.

I love you b, i aint ever gonna stop lovin you, b

I'll see you later is the hallway, loser. <3

Hello Bellarke! My name is Scarlet and I'll be reviewing you poetry today. ^^

Okay, so, I'm just looking over this quickly and I noticed a a punctuation error, which I won't point out as @Liberty500 already has, and I'm sure you don't want everyone telling you to fix it. XD

Now, as for the actual content of the poem... Hmm, let's see...

Then, I meet you, you made my heart spike,
leaving the beat prolonged.

Hi Shikora here with a review on your lovely poem.

Let's get to it.

I think this poem was really good, and you wrote it very well, it had a really nice flow to it as I read it. I think you put all your commas and full stops all in the right places. I think you have done a really good job here, like the pit a liked the most was this.

You took my darkness,

and made it bright.

I didnt know what it felt like,

Hi Bellarke!

I love this poem of yours! It's a very nice one.

OK, review time:

In the following sentence: "I didnt know what it felt like," the word "didnt" is meant to have an apostrophe like so: "didn't".

That was the only mistake I found. My favorite part is when you wrote:

"You made my monsters,

into butterflies in my stomach."

It's such a smart line.

Keep on writing!

~Liberty500