Love Me.

by BeautifulJewel

Published October 19, 2007

Love me in the Springtime, when all is green and new,
Love me in the Summer, when the sky is oh so blue,
Love me in the Autumn, when the leaves are turning brown,
Love me in the Winter, when the snow is falling down.

Love me when I'm happy, and even when I'm sad,
Love me when I'm good, or when I'm oh so bad,
Love me when I'm pretty, or if my face is plain,
Love me when I'm feeling good, or when I'm feeling pain.

Love me always darlin', in the rain or shining sun,
Love me always darlin', after all is said and done,
Love me always darlin', until all our life is through,
Love me always darlin', for I'll be lovin' you!


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Please tell me what you think by posting a areply!
Thanks. X

Comments & reviews · 8
User avatar
hiverious
Comment
hiverious commented Comment · Oct 20, 2007

It's a really nice poem that conjures up some pretty images and emotions. I really like it. The only thing that struck me about it was the last line which did seem a little off syllable wise. Good work though.

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BeautifulJewel
Comment
BeautifulJewel commented Comment · Oct 20, 2007

Thank you all for your generousity on this poem. I think i wrote it a while back at school or something but i found and decided to but it on.
I only write Cinquians becuase they are fun eciting and their short.
Please look at them that i'm going to put on now.
Thank you again. And i hope that you don't mind that i'm going to add you all os a friend.
Thanks again. X

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Shine
Comment
Shine commented Comment · Oct 20, 2007

Its flows very well,nice piece of work.

The last paragraphs repitition did work out,Keep it up thats all i can say for now.:)

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PenguinAttack
Review
PenguinAttack wrote a review Review · Oct 20, 2007

I quite liked this.

The repetition does get a little grating by the end, but it doesn't do much to detract from the poem itself. Soft and sweet, I like the way you've written it and the feelings you portray so easily.

Your last line, however, sticks out a little, it is, perhaps, the syllables in the sentance? I am not sure, it isn't wrong but it does jar a little with the poem.

All in all I liked this, nice work ^.^


*Hearts* Le Penguin.

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Someguy
Comment
Someguy commented Comment · Oct 19, 2007

This was really good.
I really enjoyed this, something different and I like different.

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Stori
Comment
Stori commented Comment · Oct 19, 2007

Hi Jess. Great poem!

Repetition works here. Yup, it's usually discouraged, but this worked.

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October Girl
Comment
October Girl commented Comment · Oct 19, 2007

Wow..... i'm impressed, I like it..... alot. I'm actually stunned. And trust me I don't become stunned easily. I think it flows well. Very nice. Are you new to the site?

-Max



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