I am broken. Can’t you see that? Of course you can’t, you wont look at me. Are you afraid to see the damage you have done?
I watch you from across the room. Absorbed in your own thoughts. I long to know if I ever enter your mystifying toughts. Do you let me in?
You did this to me. You hurt me. LOOK AT ME! My thoughts are consumed by you. I fail to escape the ever present pain, left as a reminder of what I lost.
I want you to look at me, no, I need you to look at me. I need you to see the fake smiles, forced laughter, and false happiness. Then, behind it all, you would see the crestfallen and lonely girl who has become, me.
If only you would look.
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This is such a beautiful work of art! First of all, the title is amazing. It did a great job of compelling me, and drawing me in. The first three words "I am broken." sets the mood perfectly. This poem portrays a broken heart clearly, so overall the reader is not confused. Readers can easily make a connection to the piece, which is extremely important. I also love the fact that by changing 'want' to 'need' makes, one word, makes this work complete. All and all I loved this! Keep doing what you do
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I'm so glad you liked the piece! I really appreciate the review
Thank you!!
Beautiful and haunting! I loved it so much. The poem is wonderfully written. It grips the reader and pulls them in! I'm taking a bit of a guess and saying that the poem is about abusive relationships. It could be about a lot of things but that is what first springs to mind. I feel as though the narrator is locked inside a relationship that hurts her greatly but she feels as though she needs it. That is why she longs for the person to look at her. So they can see the damage they have done. You should defiantly write more poems like this. I love your style girl!
Aww thank you!!
I'm so glad you enjoyed it! When I wrote it I was thinking more along the lines of the person wanting them to look to see how heartbroken they are. I wasnt necessarily thinking of an abusive relationship but thats the great thing about poetry, it can have a different meaning to each person that reads it. Your interpretation fits just aw well and I really like that idea!! I will definitely be writing some more poems like this one! Thank you again, it means so much to know that you liked it! 
Oh-My-Gosh, I was browsing the home page and this was there so I checked it out. Now this is just a friendly peer review and I thought you deserved some credit. That piece is so true to my own heart it was so pure. Thank you for writing such a beautiful piece. I think it would be cool if you made a conversation inside your head with that person that you love yet hate. I think that kind of structure would benefit your whole tone, but if you want to leave this just the way it is, that's ok too. Again, props to you for such an amazing piece.
Thank you so much!!! The fact that you found this piece true to your own heart makes me so happy, that I can write something that someone can feel a connection to! Adding a conversational piece is a great suggestion that I will definitely play around wiht, I love that idea! Thank you again so much!!!
Totally amazing! Oh my gosh. I loved it.
I was smiling the whole time, while reading this piece. It was such a great hook for the audience. I love the tone of the poem and I love that I felt a connection with the narrator of the poem. It was a great dramatic poem. I also loved the beginning. The beginning was the one that hooked the audience. In addition, I liked the title that you used: "Please Look".... It totally caught my attention that I decided to read it immediately, once I saw it on the screen. Overall, great job.Keep up the fabulous work!
Aw this review just made my day! I'm so glad you liked it!! Definitely a very personal piece for me so I was a bit nervous if people would like it, so I'm so excited you did! I was not sure as to what to put for the title and was the last thing I put, but it looks like i chose the right one! Thank you so much for his review it is greatly appreciated
You are very welcome. Oh my goodness! You should do another type of poem like this. You're really good at making the audience catch their attention. Just perfect!
You think so? Well I will definitely start working on another one then!! Thank youu againnn!!
Yes of course you should do another one of this type of poem. you are good. And you're welcome.
P.S. Thanks for following me back at this website.