Published September 27, 2010
Sister you're leaving me?
Sister you're going?
Why?
So you say that it feels right?
Well it doesn't feel right to me.
I'm sorry to say,
Don't go.
I'll miss you.
I love you.
Sister you're leaving me?
Sister you're going?
Alright, but come back soon.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
This is simple but heartfelt and I can relate to it. When I was quite young my brother moved away and I really wanted to ask how he could leave me at home to deal with everything. The last line 'come back soon' is sweet as we always hold a place in our hearts for people that seem to be abandoning us- we still want them to come back when they can. Good job
Jaz
The thing is, is that this is actually written about someone who is like an older sister to me. She' s really depressed, and she's going to be off facebook, texting, dA, etc. for the next three months. And I want her to come back. I'm really going to miss her.
Wow, this struck a cord with me, I was kicked out of home about 18 months ago leaving behind my younger brother and sister both believing that I would infact
but I've never moved back. You could add more emotion but I actually like the way it's written it's simplistic style is effective and you've brought my attention to the way my siblings would have felt.I really like this poem! It hits home with me because my older step sister moved out about a year ago to live with her dad. I say try and put some more emotion into it, other rhen that keep up the great work!