The Adventures of Darren Cassidy - Chapter Seven, Part Eight - Not so Great Expectations

Aiden adopted a thoughtful countenance and gazed at the sky, though not at any particular spot. “Well, let’s finish this map, then!”

The trio turned to their left and then around the corner to the right, past the Pokémon Centre’s entrance to the temple.

‘The Temple of Arceus is the only place of worship in the village and is tended by the Earhart and Cowell families,’ Minerva commented, scribbling the information down while Aiden added a rectangle labelled “Temple” to the map. “Fun fact: Every settlement has a Temple of Arceus inside its perimeter and a Pinnacle Shrine outside it, though larger settlements often have temples dedicated to other Divinities too.’

‘Could you name an example?’ Darren asked.

‘Err, sure. Brantley City in Vordarth has three temples: one to Arceus, one to Entei, and one to Volcanion.’

‘They should teach us geography and history,’ the Electrike complained. ‘But no, it’s only subjects that are related to fighting or biology.’

‘Well duh,’ Minerva replied. (Darren hadn’t realised that was an obvious fact.) ‘The teachers only start giving lessons in those subjects after we have received our Certificate of Elementary Education and decide to get our Certificate of Advanced Education as well.’

‘Why? And no “duhs” this time, please.’

‘Well, we all have to get the first certificate, but the second one is for people who either need the continued schooling for their chosen career, or don’t want to pursue the same career as their parents. If I were content with being a baker for the rest of my life, for example, then I’d drop out of school after getting my first certificate. Sadly, the second certificate demands tuition fees, so I might have to anyway, but only if I can’t help it.’

‘I can’t imagine you not getting your Certificate of Advanced Education,’ Darren mused.

‘Oh, well, you never know what the future holds. I’d like to get it, but if another opportunity comes along, you better believe I’m going to take it.’

‘I’m done with the post office, the inn, and the two residences behind the inn, you two,’ Aiden said, looking up from his notepad, ‘so could we move on before continuing the conversation?’

‘Hold on a moment, Darren. Okay, let’s see. Dalton Village Post Office is run by the Woods family. Fun fact: Post offices are much underestimated, since people easily forget the importance of communication.’

‘It’s also the source of bills,’ Darren added.

‘Would you prefer the days where the tax collector stopped by at your house?’ Minerva asked sceptically.

‘Tax collectors still exist!’

‘No, Darren, they don’t. Treasurers exist, and only in cities or towns, otherwise the governor handles the financial affairs. Now, shush, or else we’ll take the whole weekend to finish this. The Flittering Butterfree Inn is run and inhabited by the Rafferty family, which consists of Mr Rafferty the Hypno, his Toxicroak wife, and their son, Duncan. Fun fact: The inn is the oldest building in the village, but unlike the general store, has been owned by many different families.’

The three friends continued forwards on the road, past the green and purple inn (the green was that of a Caterpie and the purple that of its highest evolutionary stage) and around its back, to the left.

‘The Kana Residence is inhabited by Mr Kana the Medicham and the Cameron Residence is inhabited by Mr Cameron the Granbull. Both are teachers at the local school, and both frequent the inn.’

‘Minerva, I don’t think that’s appropriate,’ Aiden admonished.

‘Don’t worry, I didn’t add that last part to my list,’ she replied casually, ‘though it’s still the truth. Mr Kana said himself that he likes the spiciness of fermented Figy juice.’

‘Moving on…’ Aiden said, doing so literally.

They turned around, moving to the east side of the village. The buildings to their left faced towards the village, but the buildings to their right did too, so the houses weren’t facing each other.

‘Remember to add the palisades,’ Minerva told Aiden, ‘and don’t forget to indicate that the main road goes past Mr Kana’s residence and exits the village to the north.’

‘I know what I’m doing, Minerva. Just enlighten us about the people who live here.’

‘Wait, you don’t know?’

‘There are almost a hundred Pokémon that live here–’

‘Eighty-nine, actually.’

‘Whatever! The point is I’m not going to remember who lives where if I don’t come here very often.’

‘I suppose you don’t know either,’ Minerva assumed, directing her attention to Darren.

‘If he doesn’t know, then you don’t even have to ask.’

‘Ugh, boys.’

‘Nicole’s a girl,’ Darren pointed out.

‘Gah! Jefferson Residence, home to Mr Jefferson the Chesnaught, the governor’s bodyguard, Mrs Jefferson the Simisage, a waitress at the Flittering Butterfree, and their son, a Pansage.’

‘Whoalsohappenstobeyourboyfriend,’ Darren said, uttering the seven words within a second.

‘I don’t see why Nigel being my boyfriend is relevant. Okay, the next residence is…’ Minerva gazed at the house in a wistful manner, ‘vacant. We used to live here. Anyway, then we have the Pike Residence. I don’t see how five Pokémon can live in such a small house.’

Darren knew what “small houses” were like, so he objected and said, ‘If Mr Pike the Golduck and his wife the Floatzel sleep together in a bedroom, his brother-in-law, who also happens to be a Floatzel, sleeps in his own room, and James the Psyduck and his cousin Basil the Buizel sleep in the same room, then there’s still space for the other rooms.’

‘And there, most of my work has been done for me. Also, in that order, they are a fisherman, a vendor, as already established, and another fisherman.’ Minerva jotted down the words as she spoke them. ‘You know, I think Aiden is right.’

‘While I love to hear that,’ the Growlithe said, looking up from his rough rectangles and squares, ‘I am selfish and want to rub it in your face by making you elaborate.’

‘If the marketplace counts as a building, we’ve only covered twelve buildings, which means there are… three, six, fourteen, twenty-six, thirty-six, forty-four… forty-four buildings left. That’s a lot still left to cover, which means we don’t have a lot of time to waste.’

‘How do you even know that?’ Darren asked incredulously.

‘The same way I know there are eighty-seven residents in the village, of which fifty-seven are adults and thirty-two are minors.’

‘Which is?’

‘I do the most absurd things when I get bored.’