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Autism Sensory Episode

by AriannaC


Author's note: This is meant to be told by my thoughts when having a sensory episode. Some things may be unclear to the reader because of this.

What the hell am I looking at? Can that even be described as a shape? Why is there so many of them? This cluster of irregular shapes looks like diseased eyeballs in a blender.

*The episode begins*

Everybody is yelling at eachother like a bunch of madmen. Their invasive volume and comments intrude my brain and mash it. This cluster of irregular shapes is swallowing me whole. Now my skin is reacting, shaking beneath the surface and itching like it's got a rash. I WANT TO CLAW IT OFF! 

How can one person be a combination of everything that sets me off. Is this even natural or does she know what she is doing to me? SHE IS JUMPING AROUND UPSTAIRS AGAIN!!! GOD HELP ME!!!

The cooling sensation of the cold seat in the car feels amazing on my skin, raw from clawing.

Floaters are such beauteous things. What's even cooler is only one person can see a unique set of them. I shall shake my eyes around and play with my floaters!!

Animals make me so happy. They are just so different from people, but in a good way. They are much better than the miserable humans I'm surrounded by.

My mind is like a pot hole right now. thoughts and sensations are like cars and weather; each breaking my mind down into little pieces of pavement. 

God is so good. Even right now, when I am acting like a intolerable, anxious human being, he is right here with me. There is truly nobody else like him.

I WANT TO RIP MY SKIN OFF!!!!!!

There is a fat lady in the Dunkin Donuts window. What if something bad happens? Like a car drives through the building. She would be the first one hit! Oh, I shouldn't be thinking like this, it will only make me sad. GUILT!!! GUILT!!!! GUILT!!!!

All these thoughts and sensations combined in my head in a time period of 5 minutes. You can probably see how this can be overwhelming!


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13 Reviews


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Sun May 06, 2018 3:04 pm
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21gmu wrote a review...



I think this is amazing because you are capturing something that goes on inside your own head into words. That is something that is really difficult to do. You really captured the way you were feeling.

As for the capital letters, I think an interesting thing to do with this is maybe to get rid of the capital letters completely, but instead replace it with repetition. So maybe repeat "I want to rip my skin off. I want to rip my skin off. I want to rip my skin off," for several lines. This makes it easier to communicate the feeling of urgency, desperation, and panic to the readers. Or if you want, you could keep it this way. It also depends on whether this is from anger or panic because I feel like to me, you are making the capital letter seem more like anger than panic, but according to the writing surrounding the parts with capital letters, to me it seems like it is more panic than anything and if it is panic, I feel like repetition would be better.

I think this captures it nicely and I can understand the randomness like when you start thinking about animals, because your thoughts are blended together and random, probably shifting between emotions. If you are still in complete panic when switching thoughts, maybe try to make it sound more desperate.

But I don't know exactly what you were experiencing, so I can't say much. I don't know how a sensory episode feels, so the way you write it just depends on you. These are only some ideas.

I thought this was a good way to put the way you felt down into words. It sounds really difficult to deal with though, and I am glad you could try to make others understand with this piece, but I wish you the best of luck dealing with this.




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Sun May 06, 2018 9:58 am
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Tenyo wrote a review...



This is really cool! Even if it is a bit fragmented.

I think if you polished it up a bit more you could have something quite amazing. Like... author's notes are usually additional things that aren't relevant or couldn't be integrated with the piece. With this I think you could easily discard it and have an introductory paragraph instead that says the same thing. It's important because sometimes authors notes (especially ones that explain what the piece is meant to be) can feel like a disclaimer or an apology. Changing it to an introductory paragraph would demonstrate a greater confidence in your writing and also allow you to directly address your reader within the piece.

The parts with capital letters could be changed to normal letters. I think I understand the purpose of them, but for me it made some parts of the text almost impossible to read because I kept getting drawn to the large capital letters. Given your style of writing, that feeling of confusion and intensity comes across well without the need for the capital letters.

This is a really interesting way to describe a sensory episode, and I would love to see more like this. Also I've recently started exploring a similar thing of writing as a list or sequence and you've used that style in a brilliant way here. If you were to expand it I would like to see more description surrounding the sensory aspects rather than just the thought process, but for now this piece communicates it's purpose and the whole experience really well.

Thanks for posting =]




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Sun May 06, 2018 3:41 am
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Radrook wrote a review...



That goes to prove that the external worlds is determined by how our brain handles the incoming auditory, olfactory, tactile, gustatory, and visual Neural-transmissions. If the brain handles them wrongly, then we don't perceive what other people usually do. It must be very frustrating to experience a barrage of perceptions that way. Here are some articles about the condition as well as one that describes the therapy available that might prove helpful.


Sensory processing disorder
Autism Sensory Episode

Sensory Integration, Sensory Processing Disorder and Autism
https://www.verywell.com/what-is-sensor ... der-260517

The treatment for the disorder involves training the brain to respond normally to sensory input.

How to Treat Sensory Processing Disorder
Treatment for sensory processing disorder typically includes occupational therapy, introduction of a sensory diet, and sensory integration challenges that retrain the brain to respond differently to stimulation from the senses.

Each person with sensory processing disorder (SPD) has unique needs and sensory difficulties. The first step on the road to treatment is to determine which senses are over- or under-sensitive. Then, working with a trained therapist, children and adults can develop strategies to cope. Make sure to find a therapist with training in sensory integration. Some doctors don’t recognize it as a condition, and may poo-poo your or your child’s struggles.
https://www.additudemag.com/sensory-pro ... treatment/





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