Bluey the Super Blue Dog
Written and Illustrated by Ariana Reinke
Written for my amazing little brother Alex, my awesome little cousin Maddie, Alex’s best friend Ayden and my favorite soon to be kindergartner Mason.
Bluey the blue dog was a normal dog. He liked to play, sleep, and go for walks. Until one day when his owner bought him new treats called Super Treats.
Bluey ate one of the Super Treats and turned into a superhero. He was able to talk and fly. He went to the city to see if he could find anyone to help.
Bluey saw a girl looking up at a tree. He saw that her cat had gotten stuck and knew right away that he had to help her. He ran over to her to see how he could help.
“Can you please help me? My cat, Buckeye, chased a butterfly up that tree and got stuck,” the young girl asked Bluey.
“Of course I can!” He said. He flew up to the top of the tree.
When Bluey got to the top of the tree he saw Buckeye the cat. “Hello Buckeye, I am here to help you,” he said.
Bluey picked up Buckeye and carried her to as he flew back down to the ground.
“Thank you for saving my cat,” said the girl. She hugged Bluey. “Thank you!” meowed Buckeye.
“You are both very welcome,” said Bluey.
Bluey went home and told his owner all about his day. He took off his cape and hung it on the wall for another day of helping people and cats, too.
The End For Now
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125,008 Literary Works • 672,829 Reviews
Adorable illustrations!
thank you
thank you for all the nice comments! they really made my day!
Also I took a lot of your suggestions and edited my story a little bit.
This is so cute! I love the amount of effort you put into this! And the drawings are fabulous! I know if i was a little kid, I would love this story.
A couple suggestions:
1) Don't use Bluey too much. He works just fine.
2) I know this is a book for young kids, but you could combine a few sentences.
"Bluey saw a girl looking up at a tree. Bluey saw that her cat had gotten stuck. Bluey knew right a way that he had to help her. He ran over to her to see how he could help."
Maybe write "Bluey saw a girl looking up at a tree and crying because her cat had gotten stuck. Bluey knew right away that he had to help her so he ran over to see what he could do."
I changed it up a bit, but you get the idea.
This is really good. Just keep on writing!
-Banana25
thank you for the suggestions and complements
This is so adorable, if I were a small child I would love this
heck who am I kidding, I am still a child and I do love this and I'm not ashamed to admit it.The illustrations are so good and Bluey is the cutest dog ever!
thank you
First of all, I really liked the illustrations!!! ,:did you do them yourself?
x
The grammar wasn't very good, first of all, you're using the word bluey to much, for eg. "Bluey saw a girl looking up at a tree. Bluey knew that her cat had gotten stuck. Bluey knew right away that he had to help her"... .. Instead you could have said" Bluey came across a girl looking at a tree, he realised that her cat had gotten stuck and he knew right away that he could help her"
Also, I think that the first para could have been better.
This is a great children's story... And is pretty enjoyable. I just think that the idea of a super treat is a little shaky.. Cuz then every dog in the city could be a super dog.
Thanks for sharing this wonderful story.
Keep writting.
i did draw the illustrations myself. thank you for the advice and complements.
Hi! Danni here for a review!
First off, did you do the artwork yourself? I really like it!
OK, grammar:
You use the word 'Bluey' too many times, and could also combine the sentences. I would recommend this:
This is a lovely story! I really like the idea of Super Treats. I hope Alex, Maddie, Ayden and Mason enjoyed it because I certainly did! This actually means a lot to me as I used to have a blue Staffie also called Bluey who was unfortunately hit by a train last year. It's really nice to imagine him as a superhero.
Keep on writing!
Danni x
i did do the artwork myself. thank you for the tips. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Alex, Maddie, Mason, and Ayden did enjoy it, too. I'm sorry to hear that your blue Staffie got hit by a train but I'm really glad you were able to imagine him as a superhero.
- Ari
Before I say anything, I just want to tell you that I admire the amount of effort you have put into this.
Errors I noticed:
"A" and "way" aren't separate. It should be "away".
There's something missing after "carried her to". Perhaps you could rephrase the sentence a little, while you are at it.
Missing punctuation after "welcome".
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I love, love what you have done. This is very much like a children's book. The plot is simple and inspiring. The sentences are easy to understand. I love the art! It is very cute. I was transported back to the times when my mother used to read out to me from children's books. Oh, the nostalgia!
This is absolutely great. I hope your brother and cousin enjoy this piece.
Great job! Cheers.
Keep writing more and more.
thank you for the error corrections and complements! I plan on writing more and more. I'm glad that you enjoyed it