Victoria

by Angels-Symphony
  • November 1, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter

...

Comments & reviews · 1
Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

User avatar
Lava
Review
Lava wrote a review · Tue Nov 01, 2011 5:26 am

I like the idea; I don't have time for a thorough review though. Sorry.

Uncertainty and distress carve her eyes, a rich shade of dark brown
This caught me off guard. I mean, I dunno, it sounds a bit clunky? Probably because of the 'rich shade f brown'. It may sound nicer if scrapped.

Sorry it's sooo short.
<33 G'luck!



Poems were like people. Some people you got right off the bat. Some people you just don't get - and never would get.
— Benjamin Alire Saenz, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe