Growing Up Isn't As Bad as I thought...

Growing Up…

January 30, 2009

As of today, I have overcome my great fear of death. Yes, I have overcome such a fear that I truly believed would haunt me the rest of my life. The whole thing started this morning at school…

As usual, I was waiting for my friend Lege (pronounced Lay-Jay) after my first class, computer drafting. The two of us stand by each other in the morning since we both have “boy classes”. The term “boy classes” is used because these classes and basically the whole hallway is for boy classes. The whole hallway contains the electives : Weight Training (two to be exact with an actual garage door that opens on the other side), Computer Aided Drafting Design, and Wood Shop. These classes are /usually/ only chosen by boys. Because seriously, what kind of girl would choose weight training over fashion class? Really?

We decided to go against this and pick these classes because we can do boy things if we want to. It’s just a shame that whenever I’m in my class people always hit on me @_x It disturbs me on many levels. There are a few other girls in my class, but in wood shop Lege is the only girl. Since the beginning of the year I can almost swear that they’re breeding in their since each time I see the class empty out, they multiply.

I was kind of upset today since Lege was late again. I decided to go inside the class this time since she wouldn’t come out. The teacher seemed nice, so I thought “hey, okay. Why not?” The woodshop classroom was definitely NOT what I had expected. NOT. The first thing I saw was an ordinary classroom. You know, the basic five or six row of seats, a wipe board, and a teacher’s desk. But then I turn to my right and I find out that the wood shop classroom really was what Lege had told me it was: a fortress. The previous day Lege told me that she and her classmates were playing fort in the storage room and it was shaped like a fortress. I didn’t believe her. Well I did, but I didn’t think it could really be as amazing as it turned out.

But yeah, it was a fortress of high wooden ceilings, wooden shavings, power cutters, people in goggles, and every shade of light wood. Completely insane. And again as usual, we walked, or should I say ran upstairs to our next classes. The reason we run is because we always side track on the ground floor and have to catch up to our classes and run up the stairs. Every time I come to my class I’m panting, heavily. One time I actually heard someone say “Oh wow. Did you see the way she came in? She like breezed in here.” It was really funny. I couldn’t believe that I actually didn’t look like a complete idiot entering the classroom with breathing like I’d just ran a marathon.

Geometry was the same as usual. Well usual for OUR class. Our teacher is pretty cool and laid back. So the /cool/ people have our seats in the back of the class and we eat and talk and learn, but still say under control. I’m usually the one doing all the eating though xD I had my chocolate rice and my Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. My friend Steven is the real vending machine though. But he’s so nice that he always shares. I feel indebted to him. We all owe him so much and I’m the only one who admits it. It’s weird too how only I am the one who’ll admit it. We’re competitors, rivals, opponents. We’re still friends though, we just compete with who’s better with grades and just everything. Of course I win most of the time, but he does have his moments. Starting sophomore year I have to remember my worth and not borrow, only lend.

Well before geometry I wrote a note to my friend Jazlyn in Social Studies. Jazlyn is my laughing partner in our Sparkle Family. It’s basically just our own “group”, well I’m not sure if it’s a group because only the two of us qualify. But it’s really just the honesty the two of us have that make us qualify. It’s our bluntness and creative imaginations. In 8th grade we’d always write notes to each other with pilot pens, glitter glue, and stickers just to keep our childish vision on the world intact. We don’t wish to see in black and white like adults, so we perform this balancing act. We stand on a fine line between adult hood and the kiddy pool. It takes a lot of work to stand on the line, and I told her I was feeling like I might be falling into the adult hood. I mean, I felt more serious. For that increase in maturity, there had to be an increase in childness. In other words, we had to do something not boring. So I invited her to come with Lege and I to the woodshop classroom during lunch.

Lege and I found her, took her hostage, and literally ran to the woodshop room. The woodshop teacher had his wife and kids there, but they didn’t mind us. Jaz could not believe that such secret amazing fortresses existed at our school. It really was just like a mirage in the middle of the desert. The three of us went to the storage room and looked at the last storage unit. There were 3 wooden “bunks” as we call them, a desk ,and a wooden chair. Just like one of those wooden cabins. Then Lege shut the light off and we stayed in there for a while. It was then Jaz and I understood my Lege almost cried the other day when she was stuck in there. Her cell phone light lit the way to the last unit, but I still freaked out and was clung to Jazlyn’s arm. By the time we made it to the storage unit I was beginning to hyperventilate. I didn’t know which way was up and what was down. It made me feel more appreciation for the blind. It’s a real hard act, balancing. If you’d like to picture what we saw, just imagine one of those completely dark tunnels underground. You don’t know how high the walls are or where anything is. The only thing you can see is a single light, coming from a lantern or a cell phone, whichever you prefer. We all felt like someone would just come out and get us from the darkness. I was so relieved when we found our way out again and saw the light. I told them we’d so have to role play in there one day. Jazlyn and I would become honorary wood shop students.

Since Jazlyn and I were so shocked and dumbfounded by our school’s secret fortresses, we took a walk in the science hallway, upstairs so I could show her the secret ceiling stairs above the indoor stairs. It was so freaky how the stairs were just up in the ceiling. It made us all curious to find out what it led to ( the first time I noticed it was with Steven, Pau, and Shayla after Spanish class). We could not believe it. And we thought our school was normal. Pssh. The teacher who “protects” the halls kicked us out though. So we left the long way. We looked through the long set of windows and saw the big power fan that powered our school. It’s enormous. Then we saw this secret area where the art students have all their materials set up so they can graffiti. Each group in high school had their own secret places. We’d have to find the blueprints to our school and find out the rest of the secrets.

It was in dance class that I finally overcame my fear of growing old and death. We don’t really do anything in that class, so we all just talk. Our group, the real people, not the fakes, sit in the corner by the emergency exit door (though it is constantly used). I had a conversation with Lyra about the future. She wants to become a manager of a bakery, or a cake or fashion designer. Or something along the lines of a wedding planner. The reason our subject of conversation arose was because my friend Judy was wearing a fake pregnancy pack for her class. It set a time for us, making me feel like we were in the future. We all discussed our futures and kids and marriage. We agreed all our kids would have to meet one day and learn from each other. Lyra told me if her kid met my kid, her kid would become very smart. Aww, how nice ^^ I suppose it’s because of my view on the world and how I like discussions. I’m usually a pretty intelligent person to talk to… At least that’s what they tell me > < Lyra told me that she wouldn’t mind being big after having children and that her husband’s looks wouldn’t matter as long as he was loving, caring, and honest. I like the way she thinks like that. She’s really beautiful and is smart and can dance so well the dance team glares at her, but she’s still humble and prefers not to flaunt. But we all ended up talking about how maybe one day our jobs may intertwine with one anothers and how our kids should meet in the future. Lege wants to be a marriage therapist, Alyssa a pastry chef, Celine and I are going to be directors of some fancy hotels and raid the buffets since we’re going to specialize in it at our magnet soon. Then I told all of them that the future is a lot closer than I thought. Lyra told me she’s excited to grow up and have a family, and I finally realized that I was too. Getting a job, raising kids, living a leisurely life with the ones I love. It sounded nice. As long as I’m with the people I love, helping one another grow stronger. You don’t need to fear a bad future, because the future is not set in stone. The future is what you want it to be as long as you set your mind to it.