Published November 21, 2005
For you I will write a song and sing it,
I love you, I admit it.
You are a dream come true
I could not have coped without you.
These feelings have lasted too long
These feelings are too strong.
You some how stole my heart,
The moment I met you, from the very start.
But after all this happiness I feel when I see you.
I have no idea what I'm going to do.
What has made me feel so bad is,
How am I supposed to let you know?
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141,423 Literary Works • 674,400 Reviews
ahem...
I like that.
For you i will write a song and sing it,
I love you, i admit it.
Your a dream come true
I could not have coped without you.
I love these lines
These feelings have lasted so long
These feelings are so strong.
'long' and 'strong' are kind of boring words. Maybe you could add some description?
You some how stole my heart,
The moment i met you, from the very start.
But after all this happiness i feel when i see you.
I have no idea what i'm going to do.
What has made me feel so low is,
Nice, but "low" doesn't really seem to fit with the tone of the poem.
How am i supposed to let you know?
Overall, this was a cool poem. Some of the rhyming seemed forced, but most of them were quite good. Well Done!
Some technical aspects... Either don't capitalize all I's or do; just don't go for a mix. Here I would suggest just going with capitalized all the way since the use of the lowercase "I" is distracting.
"Your a dream come true "
Your should be you're.
"You some how stole my heart, "
"Some how" is one word. But besides that, saying "somehow" is to be avoided as much as possible. It's much better to describe how it happened, or, if you feel the poem will lose its meaning, just get rid of "somehow." It just sounds lazy on the part of the writer.
Overall, it's good. Just needs some minor work.