"Love" paints a picture
Of flowers and light,
But to this strong emotion
Is a darker side.
Pain and confusion
Contrast supreme bliss.
So many lovers
Are witness to this.
Doubts' biting chill
And passion's heat
Exhaust their minds
Without mercy.
But isn't love
The essence of life?
Doesn't it heal?
Isn't it right?
Oh yes to all three!
Love is liberty, breath!
Just remember when loving:
The price may be death.
**to be altered, continued, reconstructed, expanded, hopefully BETTER
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,857 Reviews
Mkay
I'm going to rewrite this whenever I get the chance.
Angel, I agree, I'd like to make it longer, and yes, the third stanza needs smoothed out.
Brian, the last two stanzas (or however many more I add) will have to be reconstructed.
Thanks for the feedback guys!
-Amice-
I didn't like the last two stanzas, but the first three were well done. Nice contrasting, and good rhyming.
The poem needs to be a little longer. But i liked the poem.
However this part of the poem broke the rhythm of the poem. Overall i liked the poem and the start gripped me