Story of the spices

by AmeliaCogin

Published April 27, 2011

In Novels

This poem is full of imagery: the title is the only clue you're getting - It's short but deep! Please take time to read and review! :)

Go on:
Drop it in;
Let sunshine slip, tumble,
Burst into life:
A cloud of gold

Let it rain
Upon the pungent moons;
Pigment them
Deep ochre

Watch:
See a blanket
Of shimmering Amber
Adorn the normality

The scent:
It bolts, erupts,
Creates ecstasy:
A melodious euphoria

Go on:
Drop it in:
Enchant and excite,
Arouse passion

The strongest muscle
will burst into Dance

Comments & reviews · 7
CuteJackRussell wrote a review Review · May 4, 2011

Hello there,

I agree with everyone that this does create a lot of vivid imagery and it has a very deep description. I always find it hard to decipher the meaning behind the words but even so I still enjoy reading the poem and indulging in the amazing language that people craft together to create poetry. I did find this really intriguing and beautiful I do hope you realise there is a lot of punctuation mistakes in this but I'm sure you can figure out waht those are for yourself. I think this is really good, keep writing.

From CuteJackRussell

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Lavvie
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Lavvie wrote a review Review · May 1, 2011

Hi there Amelia. Lavvi in to review.

Wow. You have great descriptor words which really helps us, as the audience,to visualize everything you're wanting us to. I'm not entirely sure what your concept/idea is but it possesses great imagery.

The only thing that struck me as a problem was the misuse of proper punctuation. You didn't quite get the right areas to punctuate nor with the right type of punctuation. Especially the last line of each stanza: should be a period there.

Yours,
Lavvi

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MiRaCLeS
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MiRaCLeS wrote a review Review · May 1, 2011

Agreed with the last reviewers that this poem paints a vivid picture and have beautiful imagery in it. I also think that it's a very... exotic? poem. It might've something to do with the structuring.
I'm not very good with deep poems and such, I'm either too lazy or thick to figure out the hidden meanings. I think it's the latter option, so, even though the words which painted the poem was very beautiful. I didn't understand it. Not so much didn't understand it so much as what the poem is about, I suppose.
Even though, I didn't understand it. The poem still seemed exotic to me, with lots of beautiful imagerys. Like a jungle filled with lots of beautiful flowers. A jungle because I didn't really understand it and filled with flowers, because even though I didn't understand it I can see the beauty of it. Strange metaphor, but that's how I felt about the poem.
So yeah... Keep up the beautiful imagerys! :)
Not so much the hidden meanings of it, because I can't understand it. Jokes ;). Don't listen to me. Listen to your heart (and other, more talented people that's not me). ;)

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Soulkana
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Soulkana wrote a review Review · May 1, 2011

Amelia I must say this is vey well done. The description makes this stand out and paints a very vivid picture in my mind. This is very good. I can feel the emotion you put into this. I really liked it and can't wait to read more of your works soon. Keep up the good work and I can't wait to read more. Good luck and Happy Writing!!!!!!!!
Soulkana<3

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Cole
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Cole wrote a review Review · Apr 29, 2011

Hmmm. Like I said, poetry isn't my thing, but I'll give it a try.

I'm not sure if you were aiming toward this, but I can't sense much of a beat in it. When I read it, it doesn't flow very well. Maybe I'm reading it wrong.

However, I think your imagery makes up for it. You have very beautiful imagery in this poem. I really like it. It's very dreamlike, which is totally my style.

Good work :)

~H.



The brain is wider than the sky.
— Emily Dickenson