Does the mirror lie
Twisting and bending the truth
Or should I trust it
Listening to the insults
The sharp ends of rejection
Don’t listen my dear
The mirror doesn’t know you
It knows not your strength
Only the shallow pieces
And that is not who you are
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
Love it, it's good poem. Have you tried being a bit more personal? It'd help with understanding and recieving the message more intensely.
I%u2019m not quite sure what you mean.
Like.. more in depth. AND THANK YOU for commenting questions!
I am reminded of Hans Christian Andersens "The Snow Queen" which featured a magic mirror that would only reflect the worst aspects of a person. I personally have not read the snow queen but from what I understand the mirror is broken early on, Which in my opinion is a real shame because that concept is just TRAGICALLY RELEVANT to today.
"Does the mirror lie" an amazing start it is haunting heartbreaking yet still somehow innocent. But it is also a question without a ? this may be a style since the rest is not punctuated. Perhaps this is
meant to be one long thought.
"Don't listen my dear
The mirror doesn't know you
It knows not your strength
Only the shallow pieces
And that is not who you are." I really love how you end off on a positive note. Unlike Andersen usually did. The last part feels like positive self talk in a way.
I will confess I don't quite get the title, Is this supposed to be part of some series (Wishful thinking)
Anyway keep up the good work AlmostImmortal bye
This poem was written specifically for the event going on right now: The YWS Olympics.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Heya, Rubes here with a review! Hope some of this stuff helps you improve in more pieces to come.
(I am 3 years younger than you so some of this may just be repetitive things you have already heard but I'll take my shot and hopefully give you further insight into your use of vocabulary and structure.)
First impressions: I really enjoyed this poem, just because of the simplicity of it. It is easy to interpret and understand for a variety of readers whilst still keeping things exciting. I like the structure of it and the equality of stanza length: it further shows a mirror and it's reflection. A mirror can only have 1 reflection hence why there are 2 stanzas to correspond with it.
I had to point this line out in particular. I liked the questioning of it, am I really what I look/seem to be or is my reflection a fake showing of me. It gets the reader into that state of mind with the confusion and curious mind set.
Again, this is wonderful. It further asks about the appearance. With body image as well; people judge others based on looks, we all do it. It can turn negative when we can't be happy in the mirror however, and you have shown this beautifully. For example: if you have thick, dark eyeliner with dark makeup you can be wrongfully mistaken for being disrespectful or intimidating in society.
Gorgeous ending! I love the statement of knowing that your outer appearance isn't who you are, the personality and character is.
Overall the message is amazing and has been a joy to read through,
Stay safe and keep writing (you have a talent)
Rubes x
Thank you so much for the review! While I agree this format is perfect for representing a reflection, it%u2019s actually a Japanese style! It was really fun to write and I%u2019m glad you enjoyed it.