Glitter In the Dark-Prologue

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

Anyway let's get right to it,

I grew up being told that stars could send wishes up to heaven. My mother would tuck me in at night and whisper stories about the marvels of the star palace, the realm where stars lived. She would make them all out to seem grand and majestic, give them names and histories. My mothers face would become so animated and full of joy whenever she was telling a story about the stars. Father claimed that was the only time she was truly at peace.

The bedroom I slept in was a creation of my mothers; she made it very clear that I was to feel as if I was sleeping in the stars at night. Everyone spoke of her warmly, saying that she emitted warmth and kindness with every gesture. I remember her hair and the way waves rippled through it, drawing out its beautiful blonde color. Her complexion was never faltering, something that I had always been envious of even as a small child.

Father would sometimes jest that it was as if mother had drank from the fountain of youth, ensuring that her glorious looks would always last. I knew that father loved my mother more than anything in the world by the way he would hold her, tenderly and full of protection.

That was another thing I had longed for, to be held and loved like my mother. In everyone’s eyes my mother was perfect, my eyes included, everything she did had a reason. A reason that was full of sense and would help the greater good. My mothers name was Elena, and she was very proud of its meaning. Elena means light, and that was exactly what my mother was me, a light to brighten my darkest days.

Easily the best part of this was the bedtime stories that the mother tells the daughter. Really fairytale-ish and strangely comforting

The only REAL criticism I can make is that the girl seems to idolize the mother a little too much; I'd tone that down just a bit.

Other than a couple of nitpicks, I want to see where you go with this You're a really talented writer, and I tip my hat to you, ma'am!

Hey Ally! So, I'm not going to leave a really long review, sorry... but I just thought I'd tell you what I think, and, you know, contribute to the Review Day and all...

The bedroom I slept in was a creation of my mothers; she made it very clear that I was to feel as if I was sleeping in the stars at night.

Hi there, Ally. Lavvi in to review.

There's not much I can say. In actuality, you haven't introduced to a plot. All I felt like I was reading was a melodramatic description of this girl and her parents. I've read tons and tons of prologues and first chapters in novels that seem exactly like this. I realise that you've mentioned you haven't been able to come up with a good plot yet, but you will. It'll just come to you. Just like the snap of fingers.

I'm not going to critique a lot of this piece, simply because Jetpack's already beat me to it But I'll talk about the rest of it.

You have nice descriptions in this short prologue, but I still found those quite cliché. There's so many authors I can think of that write similarly to your style. But then perhaps you haven't discovered 'your style' yet. It takes time and I totally understand what it's like to have a bad case of Writer's Block. Good exercises to cure yourself of this terrible thing are writing prompts which you can easily acquire here at YWS or simply by Googling 'writing prompts'. Those usually work to spark great ideas, even if it's the weirdest story ever

To a plot discussion. In a prologue, usually a brief idea of the plot is introduced. At least. I see no introduction of a plot here, except that maybe this girl's mother is dead. But is that the plot? I can't really see how. It's easy to expand your prologue by simply adding a paragraph or two that subtly hint to a plot.

I hope I helped!

Lavvi

*And don't forget to check over your spelling and grammar, like Jetpack's already noted.

Alright, so, I'll say this-that was very well written-a piece that played with the imagination and the readers emotions.
Although I have to admit that I don't like prologues, this was good.
How will it tie into the novel?
That's always the question because people could write spectacular prologues, and never relate it back to the story.
Try to decide if this prologue is truly necessary.

~WickedWonder

Hey,
I really liked this prologue, it gave me a good introduction to the story, but I was a bit unsure about what the star thing was about. You could have done a little bit more explaining on that point. Not too much more, but I did get a little confused.
Apart from that, I liked the flow of it and you could build a good story out of this. I'd love to hear some more about it.

Hey, Ally. I'll nitpick first, then get on to the main body of the review. Be warned though, I'm almost definitively anti-prologue. xD

I grew up being told that stars could send wishes up to heaven.

My mothers face would become so animated and full of joy whenever she was telling a story about the stars.

The bedroom I slept in was a creation of my mothers

Everyone spoke of her warmly, saying that she emitted warmth and kindness with every gesture.

Her complexion was never faltering

In everyone’s eyes my mother was perfect, my eyes included, and everything she did had a reason.

A reason that was full of sense and would help the greater good.

My mothers name was Elena, and she was very proud of its meaning.