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Phobia

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 My grandmother told me stories of mythical creatures called Demons when I was young; they came in sizes as big as a building to as small as a mouse, and all have the terrifying ability to kill and sometimes devour their victim. Those stories were on my back ever since I was 5, and 7 years later I'm still afraid that something might be lingering in my closet just waiting to pounce while I'm asleep. But in reality, if I were ever to tell anyone about my fear they'd just laugh at me for still believing in monsters; well truthfully he still calls me Scaredy Cat for just that reason... 

 I walked home from school to soon find my parents gone. A note lay on the coffee table:           

                                                          

                                   "Cat,

                                 Gone shopping, be back in a few hours. I'll pick up my your 

                                 favorite cereal! Make sure you feed Patch. 

                                                                                                  Love, Dad"

 Hurray, he didn't forget about my cereal. I threw the note away and fed Patch, my hamster, then locked myself in my room for half an hour to do my homework.                                                            

Nine o'clock and Mom and Dad still aren't home. I waited for another hour to pass by. Nothing.               I was afraid to go to bed without one of them being here; what if a Demon came in the house while they were gone? Who would protect me? Then my cell phone rang.                                                     "Help? I mean, hello?" I stammered. The idea of being alone with Demons hammered on my nerves.      "Um, Cat, it's me, Dad," he said, then laughed, "What, do you need help with homework?" obviously he thought me needing protection from my greatest fear was funny. Well I can't say he knows about the Demons.                                                                                                                                           "Humph. No, I do not." I snapped, offended, "When are you and Mom coming back?"                         "Soon. Don't worry, honey, we're almost there."                                                                              "And my cereal?" I could already taste my Fruit Loops. Yum, breakfast for supper.                                      "They ran out! Can you believe that!" he yelped. I guess my idea wasn't meant to be.                                  "I don't believe it. How could you not complain to the manager about this!?"                                                    "Mom wouldn't let me. Okay. Talk to you later, Cat." he explained. Bummer.                                                                                     "Bye, Dad." he already hung up.                                                                                                                         I had to wait several more miserable minutes until they got here, each breath I took was blustering with hot fear, so I had to cuddle Patch to help calm me down, or at least for as long as he would allow me; that squirmy little rodent...    

 Next morning, school again. I combed my dumb, tangled hair and let it hang down my back. School uniforms were my enemy. Maybe one day they would change that rule and let us wear normal clothes.                                                                                                                                                   I walked to my classroom, finding no one in there except me. It was still early; no one at all usually gets here for an hour. On the chalk board was the note that was left from yesterday, by the teacher, Mr. Mark; he sort of reminded me of a gay, but it's just his voice, it was weird. I felt something tap my shoulder. Turning around to see who it was, a finger poked my face. I growled, "Kenny!" He waved his hands and sang "Ga'cha, Kitty, ga'cha!"                                                                                           "Stop calling me Kitty!" I whined, stamping my foot. He laughed.                                                               "Wait, what are you doing here? Isn't it kinda early to be snooping around?"                                         "I could ask you the same thing," I replied, making a smug face at him. Kenny was my best friend since Elementary school, and a real a nuisance. He only calls me Kitty because he knows I hate it more than Scaredy Cat...                                                                                                                      Suddenly I heard a noise on the roof, like something was walking, or crawling on it.                                   "Do you hear that?" I asked.                                                                                                                   "Probably a cat or something," he grinned, "Kitty, don't worry I'll be here to protect you from any monsters!" he joked. Kenny was the first person I ever told about my fear of Demons, and he was my last. He's the one who made the nickname Scaredy Cat for me, but I made him promise not to tell anyone. That was a long time ago, and he still teases me about it now.                                     "No, I'm serious. It sounds weird. It's heavier than a cat." I said, but he didn't listen. Kenny walked over to the window and was getting ready to open it. Then I realized, this could be bad. What if whatever was on he roof could be my phobia? The worst thing in the entire world, the Demons? I don't want to take that chance, if there is any chance at all that Demons are outside my classroom, I am not risking Kenny to find out. "Wait! Kenny, stop, don't open that!" I yelled, running over to him.                                                   "Cat, I told you there's nothing to be afraid of..." he paused, standing very still. I hesitated for a while, then squeaked out, "What's wrong?"                                                                                                    "Ssh! Don't say anything." he whispered. We both stood like statues, listening to an odd sound; some kind of hushed growl filled the room. Now I was sure that it was a Demon, and it was a good thing Kenny didn't open the window when he did, or else something could have grabbed him. In my fear, I hugged Kenny's arm and held on tight. If there was a Demon in here it was not going to eat him, but both of us. I can't imagine life without Kenny; no matter how annoying he is, he's still my best friend. I squeezed tighter and shut my eyes, still listening to the ominous noise echo over and over, getting louder, then silencing itself again. I felt Kenny's muscles stiffen, then, suddenly, everything was quiet. I opened my eyes again. His arm relaxed. Out of nowhere he started laughing. He wouldn't stop! He laughed so hard tears began to flow down his cheeks. He smirked and looked at me with an expression that made chills go down my spine. I backed away quickly,                       "Kenny... What's wrong?"                                                                                                                     Nothing.                                                                                                                                               "Answer me!" his brown eyes suddenly turned blank and he hissed as his body began to mutate,    "Cat..." he said in very hoarse voice, "I am your fear! I'm... the Demon!"  

 I woke up to Mr. Mark smacking his gum in my face, staring at me through the old fashioned owl glasses that made his eyes look huge with a stern expression, but he still looked like he was gay.      I jumped, the back of my head colliding into the chalk board. I winced and the class burst with laughter as he said, "Sleeping in class again, Miss Cat?"  he asked, standing up very straight with his arms behind his back; I could feel his big eyes searing straight through me, digging for an answer that he actually wanted to hear. I looked passed him. In the seat two rows ahead of me was Kenny, appearing concerned but obviously couldn't contain his laughter very well. I looked back at Mr. Mark, "Well, excuse me, sir. I was, um, up all night... studying..." I kept remembering the dream...              Well, it was just a dream! Kenny can't really be a Demon, and he would never try to eat me! Which falls to a different point: is Kenny...                                                                                                "Ahem!" Mr. Mark grunted, his feminine voice slightly cracking.                                                             I sat up straight, holding the massive bump on my head, and said, "It won't happen again, M-Mr. Mark! Uh, I promise." Kenny was still staring; his eyes were normal, so he wasn't about to mutate into a Demon. Whew...

Class finally over, and Mr. Mark done giving me a lecture, I slung my heavy backpack over my shoulder and headed out the door. Kenny was waiting there, leaning against the wall with one foot resting behind his knee, his arms crossed. He looked up at me and grinned.                                   "Cat!" he ran over to me and laughed in my face, "Funny you, falling asleep in class."                     "Be quiet, Kenny! There's no need to make fun of me anymore, okay?"                                            "Whatever you say, Kitty!" he smiled. I was about to yell "Don't call me Kitty!" but instead both of us just laughed. For sure Kenny is not a Demon, and I'm totally over my fear! Well, mostly. Because now I have a new fear: Kenny... 

                                                             

Comments & reviews · 2
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waningwriter Review

Good afternoon~

Not sure how to start this so I'll start by saying that I really enjoyed your piece! Like the post before had said, the title really caught my eye! And the way you began to write this piece, I think the way you started it off was interesting.

The format in which you wrote your story confused me for a bit, other than that I can't find anything that seemed wrong or in need of criticism. Please continue writing! :)

Thanks a lot, I appreciate it and glad you liked it! ^-^

User avatar
NympheaLily
Review

Top of the morning, NympheaLily here!

This story is really interesting and the title really caught my eye. Of course there are a few errors, but nothing that really derived from the plot of the story. Here's what really stuck out that I think you need to fix:

1) "A note lied on the coffee table:"

I think you meant to say 'lay' instead of 'lied'.

2: ""And my cereal?" I could already taste my Fruit Loops. Yum, breakfast for supper. "They ran out! Can you believe that!" he yelped. I guess my idea wasn't meant to be. "I don't believe it. How could you not complain to the manager about this!?" "Mom wouldn't let me. Okay. Talk to you later, Cat." "Bye, Dad." he hung up."

This format of dialogue really confuses me on who's talking. Maybe if you edit that, I'll be able to decipher who's talking a little more clearly.

Other than that, I think this story is a really good start and I'd love for you to expand on it. The cliffhanger you put at the end was just incredible and it caught my eye. I want to read more and feel free to let me know if you publish any more stories! And as always KEEP THOSE FINDERS TYPING!
Ciao!
~NympheaLily

Thanks so much! I'm really glad you liked it, and I'll make sure to correct the mistakes whenever I get the chance.



The blood jet is poetry and there is no stopping it.
— Sylvia Plath