The beginning was ok. You need to show the setting and bring the charaters in a lot quicker. I was amazed at some of the detail, and I like it. When explaining how she or he felt try to make analogies that would explain how others could relate. I don't think it is like Twilight at all( although I am a huge lover of the series). Your charaters seem like they are a lot older, and have old legends that would explain many things aobout them. Keep up the good work!
Points: 890
Reviews: 22
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