You make yourself believe what you're not.
You aren't that person you pretend.
You are just as twisted as me inside.
Your heart is just as tainted as mine.
You can't run from the truth.
Your life says it all.
We both know that.
We are the same.
We will never be different.
My reflection, you are me and I you.
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139,643 Literary Works • 672,638 Reviews
Hi, Ruby here for a quick review of this
I like the idea of this poem. It's always interesting to read about someone who is going through that sort of self-realization and giving themselves a hard look in the mirror to come to terms with the good and the bad in themselves. Obviously, you've focused on the bad, which I felt to be a bit negative but then again, we all go through tough times and turn to writing. It was also interesting you put it in both bold and italics, but I think that was an artistic choice because the italics almost represent that this is your personal inner thoughts and, because they are in bold, it's as though these inner thoughts are very loud and important. These are words that should be taken seriously. You did a great job conveying exactly how you feel, and there was a definite mood to the piece
That being said, the structure to this felt off. There would have been some benefit to possibly breaking some of the lines up into stanzas to give a more clear separation to the ideas here. Also, you switched from using contractions to not using them a few times which causes it to not be as smooth as it could. The last line also confused me. The wording of "you are me and I you" just doesn't make very much sense and kind of just all runs together.
Nice poem, I hope you keep writing!
i like your poem it is really good i hope u write more
i like your poem it is really good i hope u write more
Hello 1998! Unique username!
I liked what you've done here and your title is great too. Reminded me of that one song from The Lion King I listen to every single day! Now, your poem here, I hope you don't mind me telling how I perceived it. So, here goes-
-clears throat-
When I started reading it, I definitely had the recent world issues in my mind for some reason so I was picturing all that. Of course, not necessarily you had the same thought in mind but that's not a big issue. We all have our own ways of thinking and understanding poetry like many other things.
Yes, I agree. We all are like masked people. We're just pretending all the time and not being ourselves. Just to be accepted or to make people happy. We forget that, it's our life and the thing that matters most is our own happiness. This applies most to our current society. We like to copy, even our parents are comparing us everyday to other kids. It's unfortunate but true.
I liked what you've tried to convey here. That, even when we're trying to run away from the truth that we're not being ourselves and just wasting our lIves, we can't run for long. We're bound to face the truth. No matter how perfect one tries to be, we're never totally perfect.
You've written here only thinking about two people but I can see all of us here. We are one. I can find little positive vibe here too. All the recent problems we're facing in our countries and again some selfish groups who want us to turn our back on each other but, we have to remember, we are meant to be one and united.
United we stand, divided we fall~
Great way to finish. Again, I can picture ourselves here. We are never different!
I think my this review was little bit weird and I kept on blabbering how I felt about your poem and all. So, hopefully, you weren't irritated.
I didn't see any grammatical errors or anything I could suggest you on. So, that's all from me. Thank you, I had pleasure reading this.
And, welcome to the site. Don't worry about harsh reviews, sometimes, you can ignore them but still, you always have the chance to make yourself better from the reviews you get! Don't you ever be sad!
~Nire.
I like this poem but I hate the narcissistic undertones and insinuations that you make.I do really hope this a joke and not a serious point of view because the best thing about humanity is that the only thing we all have in common is that we are different. Ironically your belief that we are all the same is the most common belief about human nature. You need not project your own insecurities and problems onto the rest of the world. I for one know I am different and there is nobody else quite like me, this because I don't try to follow others and as a result I have no friends but the gain is that I am a genuine and real human without the restraints of trying to be anything that I'm not. As for you, maybe you're happy to believe you are nothing because you hate the pressure of knowing that you're something. You want to fail at life and I guarantee you will with this attitude. As for the actual poem I don't like how it assumes things that it could never know, it leaves me with the impression that you are a condescending person. If this is a true reflection of your beliefs then you are an example of the dunning-Kruger effect in action. Also please don't embolden everything, you may as well embolden nothing if you embolden it all. And like I said don't try to make the reader feel stupid or wrong by assuming knowledge. They're the ones supposed to like your poems!
I don't believe that we are all the same cuz that's not true. I don't see why telling me that you don't have any friends is important. My poem is not saying that everyone is the same. I'm not sure how you came up with that idea.
Obviously, you are just here to try to upset me. I'm sorry to tell you this, but I'm not that easy to anger. I'll keep embolden my work because that is my style.Thanks for reading my poem.
-From A Fellow Writer
"We are the same."
"We will never be different."
Nobody here on this site is here to make anyone feel bad, don't go around thinking it. This is just a harsher review than my average for an edgier poem than the average.
@Pernicus
Like I said I'm not saying that everyone is the same. If I must tell you the meaning behind the poem to get you to understand, then that's fine by me. I never had to explain one of my poems before, but okay.
The person in the poem is looking at her or his reflection, seeing themselves on the outside. They know that what they seem on the outside is not at all what they are on the inside and whatnot. That is why I put "my reflection" in the last line. They are literally looking at themselves in a mirror or something else that's reflective.
@Mialynire Thank you for understanding the poem. This isn't about two people though. Just one. Thanks for the invite by the way. I'm happy that I'm here and I do plan on putting out more work.