Hello there! Sarah here for a quick review. :3
Hmmm...this poem came across to me almost like a riddle. Maybe it's the rhyming scheme, or the fact that I'm struggling to figure out what it means. I understand that poetry is meant to be an experience, not a problem to be solved, but I am finding it difficult to understand where you're coming from. Excuse me if I'm being dense. xD
However, although I don't understand the poem as a whole, there a bits and pieces that I really like. The first two stanzas, for instance, ring true and are worded beautifully. I applaud you. I just wish the entire poem was like this, instead of diamonds in the rough.
As dogs suggested, maybe a bit more description would help. Whatever made you write this poem must be important to you, and the readers want to know about it! This has a lot of potential. Keep writing and good luck!
Sarah
Points: 2619
Reviews: 68
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