Hey @Casanova! Stella here for a review.
I really liked this poem - I went back and read the other two of the series that I could see to get a little context, but even without that it exists well in a vacuum. It's full to the brim with bittersweet nostalgia and heartbreak and it's a lovely and very sad perspective to write from.
There's a couple of technical things I found distracting, first of all:
or is my mind just strictly
making kitten filled illusions
that's only ripe for heartache down the road
I don't know if we're missing a question mark after illusions or if the following word should be "those". Either way it jilted heavily halfway through the poem and snapped me out of reading to try and figure it out.
Also, I fully believe that punctuation is up to the poet, but I think you need to be consistent. The one thing that bothered me here was apostrophes, some are there and some are missing and that just looks sloppy to me. Absolutely choose to go without punctuation as a stylistic choice, but be brave about it. Half measures won't do you any good.
The kitten imagery may be personal to this relationship, and as a poem written to a person it has its worth but as an unrelated reader it ultimately was meaningless and a bit too cutesy for the poem.
Also "infer to" also seems wrong to me.
Other than those, a lovely little poem obviously coming from a personal place. Thanks for sharing.
- Stella x
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