Hello there, KittyBee~
I will start with saying I grew fond of this poem back when I only read its description - it is pretty.. haunting, in a way, I could say.. almost ominous, and it took me a moment to figure what it means. I did figure it before reading the poem, though, and approached it as to a poem about a serious health problem.
It is often given nicknames, so to say, most often just Ana, and I like it how your MC gave it a new yet still not at all unrelated name. I liked the personification of the disease, and how easy it is to imagine "her" as a real person. Truly, correct me if I'm wrong (I can't know if this was written from experience or not, but honestly neither do I think it matters for this review), but it captures the way it whispers to character's ear, almost audible and its not really existing breath brushing against that never-good-enough skin of the MC, just amazingly.
This poem flows very nicely, and I must say I didn't even notice there was rhyming until I read it again, more analytically.. which I think is a good thing, it doesn't seem forced at all.
Really, I can't say I have anything bad to write about it.. it's quite simple, yet quite effective, especially the ending. I adore that it's dealing with a pretty heavy subject in an almost alarmingly simple and relatable way, I would love to see more of your writing now :3
Although this praise was completely not helpful because I didn't give any advices or mentioned anything to improve on, I have nothing more to say but keep writing, and I hope to see you around
Cheers,
Aria~
Points: 4007
Reviews: 117
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