Young Writers Society

Hi,ALittleFallofRain what a great poem here you have!

I love the themes you bring here to show the reader.I really like the element of symbolism/representative you use here.And I think it quiet make sense to me.

#Here’s to the strangers that become friends,

First impressions that are proven wrong.

*This my my favorite lines which means to much to me.

Overall,I like your poem,again,and I enjoyed reading and digest all the words inside of my mind!
Keep writing here in YWS!
_Kudos-
~DarkKnight

Hi there

Okay a few adjectives to describe this piece: Beautiful, unique, simple, feel-good, awakening...

I really love how you've captured the essence of life's simple moments and made them seem so beautiful.

My absolute favorite thing however, would be the correlating beginning and end, superb!

I truly wanted "to turn the page"

Hi, GoldFlame here for a review!

I really think it's a deep and unique poem. One thing I loved was the simplicity of it; you reasoned that a poem about blank pages shouldn't be a complicated one. You also had a nice rhythm going (as mentioned by a previous reviewer, the repetition of words added to the piece =). Favorite lines? "Here's to the ability to keep secrets / And the secrets this place is keeping from you." "The settings of memories / that have yet to be made." Favorite four-line stanzas? 2 and 4!

However, I was not so sure about the line and stanza breaks. Were there stanzas? I initially thought that there were four lines per stanza, and that kinda made sense until Stanza 3. "The people that don't give you a second glance" is way too long for a line. So the term I would use is "scattered."

Two other minor things...

The punctuation. Maybe you were trying for two lines per sentence, two commas for every four lines, but you often put periods in places where they weren't necessary. "Here's to blank pages, / Waiting to be filled. / Unfamiliar places with fresh faces, / That have yet to be introduced." Not punctuate at all?

And in the line "Here's to the slow revealing", you might wanna go with "reveal" instead of "revealing."

Overall, it was an awesome piece, and it had great metaphorical meaning. Did I mention that I loved the ending?

Can't wait to read more from you!

Goldflame

Hey there. A blank page is to a writer as a blank canvas is to a painter. And this blank page has been filled with a very beautiful piece.

What I liked:

1. Your idea. I love how well you have managed to put out what life and writing means. Something few can do with this much success.

2. Your repeatition. I for one am a huge fan of repeatition when it is used correctly. And this my dear writer is a great use of repeatition.

What I didn't like:

1. "And those that do." You had this as the last line to a stanza and I feel like it was almost a cowards way out. With no definate structure i feel you could have done so much more with that line. It disrupted the great flow you had. Everything before and after that read well. Take another look at that line.

2. You are a tad bit scatered. You jump from idea to idea and while they are all within the same realm, they seem a bit scatered. You put things about meeting new people in two diffrent sections of your poem when if they had been one after the other it might have read even better. Things like those.

Overall:

Great metaphor for life and writing and all those things you put. Great beginning and ending. Its only the middle that needs some work. I throuroughly enjoyed this piece. Great job!

I love this! Any person who enjoys writing should like this poem! I love how it's a tribute to so many different things that come with writing. It's enjoyable and I love the rhythm and style...it's just great. And I love how you go from empty pages to full ones! It's a wonderful metaphor to life, too. Thanks for the awesome poem!