Young Writers Society

What I hate most
about
my eyes is
that there's no
sparkle
or
light.
They look dead
inside, with no
joy...
unlike everybody else's,
there's no emotions,
no joy,
no sadness,
no happiness
no depression
void of
everything
and that is what
I hate most about
my eyes.

This is lovely. You are a wonderful poet. to be more specific i love the way the poem flows it has an edge to it that really gives it a spark. It has good energy if that makes sense. eyes are defiantly a point in my writing that i enjoy. Their a window to ones true personality and it was interesting to see your description.

I personally find poetry that is written in this manner to be incredibly powerful and holds more imagery than it's lack of words might make you think. People don't seem to realize that the words and the lines are so selective and put together just so, that it makes it something amazing. Sometimes they end up in the trash, other times, (such as this one) you come up with something worth reading. Keep Writing!

This poem hold’s within it great power and depth. It’s often the small things in life that come of more value than the larger things. I personally like the way the way this poem was written, for, it could have been told through a long and complicated story to deliver exactly what you wrote in essence. I found it greatly wise on your behalf. How you took the core out of it all and displayed it in such a beautiful manner. Although I do think the poem is missing something. Perhaps, a picture of your eyes. Yes, that would have finished it perfectly. Or maybe a picture of someone else’s eyes, if you feel you don’t want to put your own up. Just a thought.
I like your style very much. Keep writing.
//Abyss.

This is a great poem.

This is fantastic.

It's refreshing to read a poem in a less wordy format, with so much depth and punch. This poem has a very grabby way to it... I felt like it had a lovely strong handhold on my attention and my heart.

And just because I feel it's important, I would like you to know that when I read your username at a glance, I saw "Alexuncircumsised."