Young Writers Society

Subdued by the haze of misery,
with a heart clamped to the longing of love,
you sweard you couldn't fight it.

You hoped so mountain high,
as you heard her singing to the moonlight;
crossing your heart and hoping to die,
before you realised and had to weep,
what would kill the joy of a Mockingbird.

Lovely tunes drifted your way,
her beauty forced into your mind,
you sweared you couldn't fight it.

You felt flooded so ocean deep,
as you raged against the burning desire;
knowing those pearly eyes would never look deep into yours.
She was a beauty like no other,
sweetly charming the cloudy night.

Time has swifted by with tranquility by it's side.
Only whispers shadow her soft voice,
and still, you swear you can not fight it.

Really nice, I love it.
The metric and the rhymes are really good, and all this gives great sonority in reading.
Then, the last verse is very special, includes poetry, but at the same time it connects again with the beginning of the poem.
Congratulations! Then, when you have time, go take a look at my writings, but I will already advance to you that my language is Italian, not English.
have fun with writing!

you sweard you couldn't fight it.

Should be "swore". Dictionaries are lovely, lovely things, and they have information on a word's tenses, usage, and history, in addition to what it means.

You hoped so mountain high,
[...]
what would kill the joy of a Mockingbird.

These lines make no sense at all. The easiest way to check that your lines make sense in the context of the entire poem is to rewrite your poem in regular prose form. Lines sometimes make it difficult to see when thoughts run away with themselves, so checking to make sure everything makes sense with everything else is always a good idea.

Time has swifted by with tranquility by it's side.

"Swift" is not a verb. It is an adjective. Using words improperly like this is almost always a bad idea, and using a dictionary and thesaurus in combination is the best way to avoid misused words while still adding variety to your word choice.

Overall, this poem had a lot of errors for its length, in addition to several lines just not making sense at all. This made for a very confusing read. Even as you try and sound poetic, make sure that what you've written makes sense. Poems aren't as enjoyable to read if they don't make sense because of misused words and runaway thoughts.