Corrupt a Wish 2

Granted, but all of the keys are stuck - beyond repair.

I wish that I could meet J.K. Rowling

Granted, but you "meet" her by running her over in your parents car

I wish I was immortal

Granted, but that only limits to aging, and once you become immortal you fall off a cliff (lol, idk)

I wish that I could meet everyone on YWS in person - no writers at my school

Granted, but one of them is a suicide bomber who kills you

I wish I had Halo 3 collectors edition

Granted, but it has a virus that blows up your X-box. You might even get hurt....


I wish....... I could fall in love. (I'm so lame...)

Granted, but you fall in love with a firehydrant

I wish I had wings

Granted, but they're only two inches, worthless, and considered a deformity


I wish that I had a boyfriend

Granted, but he's hideous

I wish I was 50 ft tall

Granted, but you smash everything in the world, including the only thing that can change you back to normal height.


I wish that I was free of my parents


(and I'm not that shallow!)

Granted, but then you have no one to take care of you or pay the bills and you are taken away to jail

I wish my teacher never gave us homework

Granted but you must do long term assignments!

I wish Taylor liked me!

Granted, but by like, he means like to kill

I wish I had a unicorn (Not really but hey)

Granted, but everyone knows unicorns don't like men much. So your unicorn impales you with its horn and you bleed to death.

I wish I felt like writing my NaNo right now. (grrr...)

Granted, but the feeling never leaves and you starve yourself to death

I guess MadHatter didn't have another wish, so I'll just give mine.

I wish that I completely understand, read, write and speak Japanese while still retaining my current abilities in the English language.