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Never ending bliss~Chapter 1



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Sun May 11, 2008 12:38 pm
angelicahandover says...



"Cheers to you, my friend!"

Glasses were raised and everyone in the ballroom was standing, facing the bride and groom. The man who had just spoken was tall and handsome. He was the best man for the wedding. The groom's best friend. "Thank you so much, Eric," the groom grinned.

The whole room shouted in unison, "Cheers!"

The bride was all smiles. Her parents beamed, "You're so beautiful, Claire."

The groom held onto his bride's hand, "This is the happiest day of my life. I love you Claire. As long as you're alive, I'll have all the happiness in the world."

Claire blushed, "George..."

The couple embraced and everyone applauded and cheered. Indeed, this was a joyous day for the bride and groom.


~~~~~

Claire opened her eyes. She had the memory of her wedding day played as a dream in her mind. Damn. Memories involving George and her always made her feel queasy. She sat up quickly, making the bed shake a little.

Eric shifted in his sleep. "Claire..." he muttered.

Claire's frown dissolved and she smiled. Stroking his hair, she muttered, "I'm here, darling."

At her touch, Eric woke up. He sat up and scratched his head. Bed hair. Claire giggled, "You've got bed hair. How cute." She neatened his brown hair, "There you go."

Eric smiled, "Thanks."

Claire got out of bed and stretched. She made her way to the wardrobe and took out a frilly blouse and a skirt.

"Oh, isn't that the outfit you wore when I first met you?" Eric asked, eyes wide.

Claire felt a tinge of guilt. "Y... Yeah..."

Eric shifted uncomfortably in bed, "On your third date with him."

"Eric, please... Don't mention anything about George."

Eric covered his face with his hands, "Don't wear it. Please." He obviously felt guilty too.

She put it back, "Sorry."

Eric sighed, "It's fine. I'm going to work." He walked to the wardrobe and grabbed a suit and tie. "I won't be back till eight. I need to meet up with a client."

She nodded, "Alright. See you then."

Eric walked out of the room after his bath. "Bye, Claire."

Claire kept silent in response. Eric didn't bother to repeat himself. He just closed the door shut.

She closed her eyes tight. How long had it been?

Six months. Six months since the end of a relationship. Seven since the start of one. Claire held back a tear. She felt responsible. Responsible for his death. George's death.

She had been married to George for a eleven months when it happened. She hadn't meant for it to happen. She really hadn't.

~~~~~~~

"Hey George? What's your answer?"

George played with his brown curls that were dangling at his side. He was nervous. George heaved a loud sigh, "Alright. Be home by eleven, alright?"

Claire nodded and her eyes twinkled like a little girl. Eric and her were going to have a drink together because George had to leave early to attend to something urgent at the office. It would be her first time being alone with such a dashing man.

She kissed George good bye and walked towards Eric, who was waiting at the entrance of the pub. George got into his car, looking worried. It was as if he knew what would happen.

They were drunk. Eric and her couldn't think clearly. That was when Eric confessed that he liked her more than he should. She was his best friend's girl. And he was trusted by George. He shouldn't be so horrid as to steal his girl. Claire completely agreed. Then, something happened. She didn't know what sparked it. She was still clueless. Claire really liked Eric. She really did. He was everything she wanted. A man who had a great job, nice house and nice body.

That night, she came home late. Claire reached the door at 4a.m.. Eric had dropped me off because she had insisted she couldn't stay the night. Especially after what happened.

George was sitting on the sofa, waiting for her to get back. "I tried calling," he said, coldly.

Claire felt a stab of guilt. Here he was, staying up just waiting for her to come back from having some fun with his best friend. George got up and headed to the stairs, "I'm going to sleep. I hope you had fun with Eric."

She was shocked, "What do you mean, George?"

"You smell of him. Of his cologne."

Claire had never heard George's voice that shaky before. He was hurt. And she had caused it. She slept on the sofa that night, crying herself to sleep. The next day, George brought her to the divorce court. They were ending their relationship. She tried to plead with him but he wouldn't listen. She tried her best to save the marriage. She really did.

He wouldn't forgive her. He wouldn't forgive Eric.


~~~~~~~~~~

Then, it happened. George was on the way to deliver the divorce papers to her. He was driving to Eric's house. She shuddered at the memory.

She could still remember the amount of blood on the road. The police had called her and informed her of the accident. George had been sent to the hospital. However, she didn't head there immediately. Both she and Eric headed to the accident site first. George's car was a wreck. Blood was everywhere. It was hard to believe all that blood came from one single person.

Claire bit her lip. She let a tear fall. "George..." she uttered. She took in a deep breath. She had to forget him. She was in love with Eric. And Eric was in love with her. They were happy with each other. And George couldn't do a thing about it. He was dead after all. Wasn't he?

And anyway, she had gotten over George a long time ago. Eric was her new man now. George was history. Or maybe he wasn't...

Claire gulped. She remembered all the things that had happened to her and Eric. Eric's mother had died suddenly of a heart attack the day after the accident. And Eric's father was diagnosed with brain cancer a week after.

It wasn't all coincidence. Someone was causing all this to happen to Eric's family. And she had a feeling she knew who it was.

"I never expected him to be this spiteful..." Claire muttered under her breath as she left the house. The day was cloudy and it further dampened her mood.

"Damn you, George."
Last edited by angelicahandover on Fri May 16, 2008 1:06 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Love, a wondrous power that Science can't explain.
  





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Sun May 11, 2008 5:27 pm
TNCowgirl says...



Um, wow.

That was good. Just in my opinion after someone dies they can't do anything to anyone down here. Course you can make your people believe that.

IT was good though. Just a few minor things. It was odd, though, I mean it moved weird. She's in love with the dead dude, but says she is in love with the alive dude. And Ya. It was good though.


TNC
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Sun May 11, 2008 7:51 pm
melanie21 says...



That was really good. The charachters were interesting. I don't quite understand the main charachters feelings about george. When you mention the chandeliar shaking due to the noise the made after that isn't necessary. The plot did a really good job of drawing me in. Calling Eric "the man" at the start of the story conflicts with the end of chapter one when the main charachter says she loves him. I'd love to read the next chapter, pm me!
"Love as thou wilt" Jacqueline Carey
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Sun May 11, 2008 8:01 pm
GryphonFledgling says...



So... I'm a little confused. Did she ever actually marry George? Or was that just a dream her unconscious self conjured up because she is actually in love with George? Also, was she dating Eric already when George died?

Anyway, am I scenting a bit of supernatural storyline coming up? Hauntings are always good.

So, yeah, like I said, I'm a bit confused. This chapter runs by really quickly and I'm really not getting to know any of the characters. Therefore, I really don't care about them very much. When you talk about George dying, I'm like "Okay, so what?" Maybe a little bit more about him and why Claire broke up with him (if that is indeed what happened - sequence of events could be made a bit clearer too) Slow down, take as much time as you need, and take us through what happened. Maybe have some flashbacks or start it earlier, instead of jumping right into the story. Sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn't. Show us how it happens, 'cuz I'm a little lost.

Good luck!

~GryphonFledgling
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Mon May 12, 2008 1:02 pm
angelicahandover says...



Edited. :)
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Mon May 12, 2008 1:45 pm
day tripper says...



That was good.
Reall, I liked it.
Though,
I would suggest maybe putting your
flashbacks in italics so that it doesn't
confuse your readers(like it did with
me, haha) and maybe even putting
a date like May 2008, you know?
Well, anyways, I thought it was good.
I'm really interested in the next part
to see where this leads.

Good job(:
A little less inhuman.
A little more brutal.
Let the blood be your drug.
  





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Tue May 20, 2008 12:27 am
soconfused4512 says...



ok i REALLy liked your story
~OdD~OnE~
  








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