Young Writers Society

b]Days of wind past by me. </p>

And I cannot long to bear. </p>

This wind is cleansing to the body. </p>

It's like your touch on a summer’s day. </p>

Then why does it feel like there’s no hope in the world. </p>

It’s like a rainy day with clear blue skies. </p>

I can see the heavens, but I can't see the light. </p>

Without your smile the light disappears without a trace. </p>


An I am invisible like my heart is there, but I don't exist. </p>


- Keith. </p>[/b]
_______________________________________________</p>



TO: 17teenchic42
From: Crazygirl_23
B/C: Pickle is a funny word...

Hey G,
Hey Ginny guess what I’m finally in NEW YORK safe and sound. Ya and I miss you guys already. Getting accepted into CVBS isn't fun unless your here. Anyways e-mail me back or else I will hunt you down. (On spring break).
Love ya,
P
Ps. write back as soon as you get this.

I close my laptop and look up at the sky. This year was going to be a living hell if you know what I mean. I'm a freshman at Claremont View Boarding school. It only allows juniors and seniors. Because of the accident last year with the freshman and the sophmores.So technically I am a freshman to the seniors. I took a deep breath and went on my way. The wind was settled on my face as I walked to the Milton dorms. “Heads up!" I wiped around only to be met by a football in my face. “Ouch." I whispered to myself and stumbled on the side walk. I blinked twice and rubbed my nose. “I am so sorry."

A guy about 6'1, Sandy brown hair with highlights, and emerald green eyes was standing right in front of me." IT's okay I think it’s just swollen." A smile grew across my face as I looked into the guys eyes. “Hi I’m Pyra Paton new Junior at this school." I pulled my hand out so he could shake it. “Well, that means I’m your English teacher Mr. Mark.” He shook my hand roughly. As I softly pulled away from his grip I notice that he had dimples. “Well, at least I won't be totally lost on teachers names."

He just softly nodded. I realized what I just said and quickly looked down and blushed. “I mean I will at least know one of my teachers because it’s my first day and stuff and I won’t be able to… I’m going to stop talking now.” Now I know he must think I’m an idiot. And on top of that I’m sweating. “Doth add more grief to much of my own.” He said as he was looking in my eyes. I let out a chuckle and smiled.

“Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs: Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers’ eyes: Being vexed, a sea nourished with loving tears. What is it else? A madness most discreet, A choking gall, a an preserving sweet. Farwell, my coz. Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, act one sconce one, line 190.” I smiled and looked into his eyes until I realized we were getting kissing dissentience. “Oh, well I better get some ice for my nose.” I said as I quickly pulled away and started to walk away. “I’ll go with you.”


I turned around slowly and looked at him as I can see the sun from the corner of my eye. “It’s okay I got it.” A smile slipped up my face and I turned away. ~ I can’t believe I was inches away from kissing my English teacher who in a weird way insulted me. But I just-~ I bumped into something or someone. “Ahhhh!!!! You freak you made me drop my cappuccino.” I looked up at the girl, her baby blue eyes and her freshly plucked eyebrows were looking at me with an I 'm going to kill you look. “Hey, freak you’re a freshman aren’t you??”

Her smirk made me get all queasy in my stomach. “ Ya. Why what’s it to you?” She gave me that’s brave of you to say since you’re lower than me look. “Just keep out of my sight or else .” She walked of with a pissed look on her face. “ You know that was offely brave for a freshman. To a senior.” I turned around and saw a with dirty blond hair, sweat dripping over his crystal blue eyes.He stood about five inches over me and he had a basketball in his hand. “ Thanks, but truthly that scared the crap out of me.” My eyes wondered around everywhere excepted his face. “ My name is Josh.” I finally got enough guts to look at him. I picked the wrong time to look at him because I almost melted when I saw him smile.

“ I’m pyra….” ~am I blushing …please say I’m not.~ . If the sititutation wasn’t intense now all of his friends were headed this way. “ HEY!!! Josh,come on we have to go.” I look around to see who that wasmy rolled back to him then to the guy, then to him..... HE HAS A TWIN!!!!! " Hey I hope to see you around school sometime okay." He wipes around and starts running toward his twin . I turn around and look back one last time and to my surpise his eyes met with mine at the same time.

Who knows maybe this year will be interesting after all.

Wow... the beginning was great, and then she turned into a slightly psycho-b**ch-let-me-yell-at-anyone-who-annoys-me type of person; she overreacted a bit at the end, but other than that, I liked it a lot!

<3s Izzy

[pre]i liked how it began,
but it got a little weird at the end.

i do like the plot though,
if you keep it going,
and stay with the boardin school theme,
it will make a great story.

oh.ps.you had a couple of spelling errors.
easily fixed, though.

<33heather[/pre]

Beginning, very good. A delicious tale of forbidden love is what it says to me. yummy... though I have been wrong before, so my apologies if I'm off the mark.
I think the end bit with the popular girl and the coffe is unrealistic. Personally I think it would be more realistic if Pyra was mortified and embarrassed, rather than turning around and throwing all manner of insults at the other girl, but it would depend on what type of character you want her to be. Just... down-play it a little
Other than that it is sounding great

I liked the begining.
It has a nice story line,
an uncommon twist to it.

The end was a little weird,
but I guess everyone writes
something a little weird every
once in a while. d: